Fighting For The Doctors Affection (Manxman)

Fighting For The Doctors Affection: Chapter Nineteen

Good Afternoon, Morning and Night Jitterbugs. Here is the next chapter and Surprise, Surprise it didnt take another month. Lol. Anyways i hope that yall enjoy it. Thanks for all the support.

Tiggs.

Dedication:VoakBasterd (Im so glad you still have faith in them ending up together not many do!)

Song of chapter: Ron Pope- If You were a Stone

Chapter NineTeen:

Vaughn quickly ran his fingers through his hair as his eyes stared at the front of the room, where his professor was speaking as the man slowly paced around the small space. Taking a slow and gentle breath of air Vaughn still couldn't believe that he was here at a place of learning.

Honestly he wasn't sure why he had ever left the pursuit of knowledge had always interested him.

Rapidly blinking his eyes he knew that no matter what anyone said to him back then, he would still have done what he did. Because his whole outlook on life and what he wanted got all bent up. He knew that if he would have just stayed in school, and never even contemplated accepting the job that Ezekiel offered him that things between him and Athiss may have turned out differently.

But sadly he knew that no matter what he did, nothing would or could change the past now. All that he could do was work hard for a better future.

Slowly flicking his tongue out Vaughn tilted his head to the right and that's when he noticed a boy and girl looking at him and pointing. He knew that there was a possibility that people could recognize him from his videos.

But he wouldn't run from it. He wouldn't hide. It wasn't as if he was ashamed. It was a part of his past. Okay, if he was being honest with himself he was ashamed of them. But it was a part of who he was. It was a part of his past.

A past that he no longer had any interest in. He knew that if he would have just seen this sooner than maybe he wouldn't be feeling so alone, so afraid.

If these two knew who he was, who cared? It wasn't as if they mattered to him. All he was here for was an education and a way out of the mess that he had caused with his husband, his love. Although the attention that they were giving him at this precise moment had him feeling as if he didn't belong in his own skin. He wouldn't run.

He hated how when he wasn't in front of the camera, any look that wasn't from Athiss made his skin crawl, made him want to curl up and disappear. His anxiety of the looks was starting to get to him. And although he knew that being back in school was what he needed to do for himself to help his grow as a person, there were a few times where he just wanted to walk out and say:'screw it.'

But the fear of failure made him stay here. He knew that it was only a few days until the three months he had asked Athiss for were up. And although that was at the forefront of his mind, he knew that he wouldn't contact the man.

He couldn't. He felt as if he didn't deserve Athiss or his love.

Every time he thought of picking up the phone, he panicked. He panicked so bad that he went right to booze, to the one thing that he shouldn't go to. It always fucked with his mind, and made him think things that weren't true.

It was the one poisons besides: porn, sex, and being in front of the camera, that were an addiction to him.

Quickly blinking his eyes Vaughn turned his head back to the front of the room as he did he slowly tapped his pencil on the desk watching and listening to everything that left his professor's mouth. He knew that he needed to take notes, but today was Friday and he would just do it over the weekend.