Keep It To Yourself -Gallavich

So be it

I guess you could say in total it's been a week since I've seen Ian, but we did make out a few days ago but that's all we did.

I miss him.

It feels weird saying that.

But I don't think it's a bad weird- just weird.

Weird is a weird word.

Mickey, go outside. Do something Jesus Christ.

Great now I talk to myself.

Eh, whatever keeps my busy.

I get up and start to get dressed.

I'm going to see Ian today.

Wait...is he busy?

I put my jeans on and sit back down.

I grab my cell phone and click it on.

I click around the phone until I get to Ian's contact.

I stare at it for a moment. Something doesn't want me to click it but I do anyway.

I put the phone up to my ear and listen to it ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey."

"What's up Mickey?"

"I was thinking maybe we could do something together. Later, if you're not busy."

"Um...yeah, sure. What do you want to do?"

"I don't know. You could maybe just come over here if you want. Or we could go out." My voice wavers at the end of the sentence. I don't think I'm ready to come out yet.

I'm glad Ian doesn't know that and just thinks that we should take it slow just in case.

"You don't seem to sure." He kind of laughs through the phone.

"Yeah, I'm sure. We can do anything you want."

"Ok. Yeah. What time do you want me to come over?"

"What times good for you?"

"I'll be there around 7."

"Alright."

I smile and hang up the phone.

"I really think I like you Ian Gallagher." I whisper to myself as I turn the phone off.

I set the phone on the bed and stand up to put a shirt on.

I put my coat on and walk towards the drawer full of guns.

I grab a handgun that I didn't really care to look at what kind it was.

I unload the magazine and check to see how many bullets are in it.

There's enough to kill about 10 people, so I slam the clip back into the gun and shove it into the back waistband of my pants.

I stand up and Titus gets up also. I grab his leash from the dresser and walk to the front door where my shoes are.

Why did I leave them here?

I usually put them in my room?

I put my shoes on and turn around back towards Titus who still has his sweater on.

I clip the leash and grab keys from the table next to the door.

I turn the handle and immediately let go of it.

It's fucking freezing.

"This isn't fucking Antarctica! What the fuck?"

Titus just looks up.

I grab the door handle again and actually open the door this time.

As soon as it opens a big ass wind hits me dead in the face.

Holy shit.

I walk out onto the porch and shit the door behind Titus making sure it's locked.

I look around at all the snow and covered houses.

I should probably not walk towards Ian gallaghers house today, right?

Since I'm seeing him later.

I turn right and walk down the street listening to nothing except the sound of Titus' footsteps.

It's nice walking. I never really noticed until I found Titus.

I go to turn right in the corner when some dumbass slams on their fucking brakes and hits their horn for no fucking reason.

Probably drunk.

"Hey! The fuck are you doing?"

The driver swerves and hits the gas.

There's hardly any ice or snow on the street, so how the fuck can he not control the damn car?

Luckily he didn't hit me.

Or Titus.

Especially Titus.

I continue to walk and I just mainly think about nothing.

Think about a certain Gallagher and if it's ok to be gay.

I'm still not sure if I want to be gay.

But I know I like Ian.

So if that makes me gay then so be it, right?

Yeah, so be it.