Just When I Needed You Most (Sequel to Forever & Always)

Chapter 14

CARRIE POV: Three hours and an ice cream tub later, Tim starts to really open up. I don't know why, but I really feel I can talk to him too. He really seems to listen.

"The night everything happened went so well, at first." He starts. "The kids were watching and smiling and Faith was just so beautiful that I couldn't stop smiling. She was singing and I was sitting back just memorized. Next thing I know, I hear a loud explosion, but she was okay. And in a sense, I was relieved. I looked over, and the girls were okay too. I remember that it was right when I ran towards Faith that the two other bombs went off." He said. We are now laying down in his bed, my head is on his chest and he's playing with my hands. He sounds like he's in pain just talking about it. "I remember standing in between my wife and my kids, trying to decide who I should go to. Betty ended up taking care of the kids, so I helped Faith. Then Jack came, shooting the people who were down, so I had to run. Next thing I know, Jack had Audrey at gunpoint. I managed to get Audrey out, but she hid where she could see everything."

"She saw Faith die?"

"Yeah..."

"Wow. Tim, I'm so sorry. That's a horrible way to lose someone you love." I said, looking up at him.

He nodded, but had nothing more to say. "Tell me something tragic about you, now that you know my whole story." He says looking back down to me.

"I'm moved here to Nashville from Oklahoma..." I began to say.

"Man, that's tragic." Tim laughs. I playfully punch him in the stomach, which may I mention, is solid. 

"I wasn't done!" I said laughing. He laughs once more and tells me to continue.

"I was in an abusive relationship with a guy named Derek. He threatened to kill me, if I left. Then I got pregnant and he found out, and made me get an abortion. I probably wouldn't have even made it full term anyways." I said looking down, spoiling whatever mood we had before. 

"Carrie, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean..."

"It's alright. The good thing is that I'm out of that relationship now, and he has no idea where I am. And that's the way I want to keep it." I say looking into Tim's eyes. They're absolutely stunning. They make me feel safe, just looking into them. "When Audrey talked to you on the answering machine, I don't know. It just made me happy, because I dream of having someone talk to me like that. Having them be so excited to see me and just love me unconditionally."

"Parenting has it's perks. It's also a pain in the ass. It's great when you enjoy who you're with and if you raise the right kids. I feel like I've really screwed up with mine. I kind of just cut them off when they needed me most." He says solemnly.

"Tim, I think you have a fear of being helpless."

"No shit." He says looking up at the ceiling. "Everything bad happens when my hands are bound. I fear that I can't protect my kids. I had always feared that I couldn't protect my wife, and look what happened. There was nothing I could do. Absolutly nothing."

"That's why you should stop blaming yourself. You can say 'What if' all you want, but you couldn't do anything. You can't do anything to get her back now either. It's hard to admit it, but it happens. You just have to look at what you have, and take as much care of that as you can." I say, as Tim kisses me.