TIM POV: Memories of the way things were 7 years ago flood my head, after I pass out. I hear the kids laughing, the dog barking, and Faith singing to them as they go to sleep. The memories about writing and singing with my best friend every day and night. Memories about holding my kids, while reading them bedtime stories. Memories about Faith telling me she loved me more than a thousand times a day.
"Oh my gosh, Dad. Dad, wake up! Daddy please..." I become conscious by this rude awakening. Gracie is screaming, trying to get the noose off of my neck while Audrey stands, horrified right next to me. Gracie must have cut me down. Maggie is dialing 9-1-1.
"Dad? Stay with us okay? Everything is going to be alright, I promise." Gracie says holding my hand. Am I awake again? This doesn't feel real. I wonder if she understands that I did this on purpose. I don't want everything to be okay. I want to be dead. I can't do this anymore. I have nothing to live for. The girls are all grown-up, and on their own. They can take care of themselves.
I heard myself crying, and screaming why. Gracie was trying to make Audrey leave the room, but she wasn't budging. They are forced to watch their drunken, delusional, and suicidal father, roll around on the ground asking why Faith and Carrie died. Gracie looks ashamed of me, and she has every right to be. If I were her, I would've left me hanging. I did this to myself, I deserve the consequences.
"She's gone..." I cry out. "Why would they take her from me? Who would do that?". Gracie grabs a blanket and throws it over me and begins to cry.
Everything I physically do feels like an out of body experience. I can't feel anything. Everything I say is also from somewhere else in my head. It's like I'm watching myself.
"Why did you save me? I wanted to die!" I started yelling at Gracie. She gets up and leaves the room. Audrey follows, leaving me alone in my misery.
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Just When I Needed You Most (Sequel to Forever & Always)
FanfictionSequel to Forever & Always: Tim now has to face one new major conflict in his life: Living without Faith. This sequel tells Tim's journey through alcohol, mourning, and maybe even new love.
