Darted Hearts

46

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” Tanong ni Demi habang nagmamaneho.

Tulala lang akong nakatitig sa bintana ng sasakyan. Pinagmamasdan ang mga naglalakihang gusali ng Mexico.

Binabalik-balikan ko pa rin ang huling katagang binitawan niya. I am so sure it was him. He’s the only person who calls me Scarlet.

But how could he just say a plain sorry after everything? Did the words left him, leaving him speechless?

I was expecting for more. More, than just a stupidly plain sorry.

I was about to answer him nang nagring ang phone ko.

“Yes, May?”

“You’ll be flying to New York tomorrow for the NY Conference. It will last for how many days, pwede mong isama sina Haste  if you want o ‘di kaya pati na rin si Audrey.” Ani Mamay mula sa kabilang linya.

Nasabihan na niya ako tungkol dito ngunit ‘di ko inakalang bukas na pala.

“Okay, May. Pauwi na rin naman kami ni Demi, we’ll talk about the details when I get home.” Wika ko bago pinutol ang tawag.

Ani niya’y parte ito sa pagiging UEP champion ko. That news reached every corner of the world as what Lhui had promised me. Marami na rin akong conference na napuntahan.

Meeting the fans, receiving a lot of gifts and letters, guesting, I guess they are all a part of it.

“Stop the car, Dems.” Biglaang sabi ko nang namataan ko ang Art Museum.

Bumaba ako and I directly went inside wihout any second thoughts.

My eyes were roaming around the place, scanning every painting each side.

Bawat pintang narito ay halatang bunga ng pagmamahal sa pagpipinta. I really believe that painting is also a vocation sapagkat sa likod ng mga nagagandahang mga kulay na ito ay ang matinding emosyon at mabibgat na mensaheng nagtulak sa amin upang makabuo ng nga kakaibang gawa.

Habang naglalakad ay napatanong ako... bakit nga ba ako narito? Where is my feet taking me? Dahil ba nandito ang painting niya?

Ganyan ka na ba kadesperada, Riya? Na maski ang katauhan niya sa larawang iyon ay pagtatiyagaan mo?

Do you long for him that much? Well, I don’t know. There must be some reason right?

When I was almost at the Museum’s heart... it’s like all of my senses left me. Parang nag-ugat ang mga paa ko sa kinatatayuan ko.

Bigla akong nanlamig. Dumadagundong na parang tambol ang puso ko.

The familiar pain came back. Ni hindi ako nakagalaw at nanatili ang mga mata kong nakakatitig sa taong nasa harap ko.

Bed of sweat formed. Rushing beat of heart. Tightened nerves. Dried throat. Moistened eyes and a torn heart.

Pinagsikapan kong makagalaw at nagtago sa isa sa mga rebultong nasa gilid ko.

Right in front me... are bunches of medias and press... flashing their blinding lights directly at the very man who’s in the painting.

He’s not made of paint nor attached to the canvas nor been hanged in the wall but he’s standing right there, pure flesh of the very man who’s been my happiness and sadness, he’s standing right there looking more handsome than before, he’s standing right there giving my painting a life, he’s standing right there... as real as these tears that are streaming down my face.

“Frau.” Paanas na wika ko kasabay sa marahang agos ng aking luha.

You’re here. You’re really here.