Finding Home

Chapter 38

Logan looked over at the woman sitting next to him on his couch. They'd finished watching The Godfather somewhere around halfway through the bottle of tequila, and she had insisted on watching Sleepless in Seattle next. Rory was quoting the movie word-for-word and crying quietly as Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan found their way to each other. She'd had far more tequila than he had, and he was amazed that she was still upright. He turned the television volume down and turned toward her.

"Do you want to talk about what's going on now, Ace?" he asked.

"I'm not enough, Logan. I'm never enough, and they all leave," Rory whispered.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, confusion evident in his voice.

"My dad left, Jess left, you left, and now Finn's going to leave me," she sobbed.

"Finn isn't going to leave you, Rory. He's crazy about you," Logan said firmly.

She reached for the tequila bottle and he snatched it up before she could get it, handing her a bottle of water instead.

"You need to drink water, not more tequila," he insisted.

"But maybe if I drink more tequila it won't hurt as badly," she whispered.

Logan's heart broke for her; she looked so broken and fragile in that moment.

"Why do you think Finn's going to leave you?" Logan asked.

Rory looked up at him and took a deep breath.

"They always do, Logan. I get close and then they leave. I'm not enough to keep anyone around," she said quietly as tears streamed from her eyes.

"You know that's not true, Rory. You're more than enough; some of us are just too stupid to realize what we have and then we spend years regretting that we walked away," he answered honestly. "That still doesn't tell me why you think Finn's going to leave you, though."

"He hasn't come home until after the bars close down for the last week. He told me he was working; but I guess he's been out drinking with you guys. He lied to me, Logan. I feel like I'm living with a stranger right now," Rory answered dejectedly.

Logan took a deep breath and gave himself a moment to think through what Rory was telling him. Obviously he knew that Finn had been closing down the bars for the last week, because he'd been right there with him. He didn't realize that Finn had been lying to Rory, though. He would be really upset too if he were in her shoes, and he didn't know what to do to help her. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He was just about to speak when Rory continued her rant.

"I mean, if he's lying to me about that, what else is he lying to me about? Is there someone else? Does he really love me? Is this all just a joke to him?" she asked angrily.

Logan swallowed hard. This was the closest he'd gotten to seeing how Rory must have been during the bridesmaid debacle, and he hated the idea that he could have done this to her, too. She was sobbing openly and before Logan could stop himself, he gathered her into his arms and held her while she cried on his chest. He stroked her hair and rubbed her back soothingly, whispering comforting words in her ear.

"Hey, everything's going to be okay, Ace. I'm sure that he's just been stressed and blowing off some steam. He loves you, and there's no way he would ever cheat on you."

Rory just sobbed harder, her body shaking in his arms.

"How do you know that? I feel like I don't even know him anymore," she choked out.

"Rory, he's my best friend. I know him, and I know he would never do that to you," Logan said in an attempted to reassure her.

"But he'd lie to me?" she whispered. "Where's the line? What kinds of lying are okay?"

Logan sighed and silently cursed his best friend for putting Rory, and by extension him, in this situation. There was really nothing for Logan to say to make it better because when it came right down to it, he didn't understand what Finn was doing at the moment. As someone who had loved and lost Rory Gilmore, he knew that he would do anything in his power to make her happy and to show her how much he cared about her if given half the chance. Suddenly he found himself just as angry at Finn as Rory was.

He pushed down all of the emotions that he was feeling and looked down at the woman who was crying in his arms. She was curled up on his lap and clinging to him for dear life. Even with her red, swollen eyes, she still was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. He continued to comfort her as much as possible until she finally fell asleep in his arms. He watched her sleeping peacefully for a minute and finally got up and carried her into his bedroom. He laid her down in his bed and pulled the covers up over her. He was certain that she would wake up with one hell of a hangover in the morning, so he retrieved two aspirin and a bottle of water and sat them on the nightstand next to her so she would have them when she woke up.

He watched her sleep for another few minutes and swallowed hard. Everything that he wanted in life was lying right there in his bed. This was the hardest decision of his life. Did he crawl in bed next to her and relish a night of having her in his arms? Did he wake up next to her tomorrow morning, help her mend her broken heart, and promise her that he would spend every day for the rest of his life making sure that he treated her the way that she deserved if she would only give him a chance?