Slow Love

January 2, 2014/Evening Alone

January 2, 2014/First evening alone on the yacht

While the crew prepared the ship to sail, we went up to the sun deck to catch the sunset. He spoke to a crew member to insure our privacy will be maintained this time. When we arrive, there was a nice after dinner drink awaiting us, Tequila Sunrise or should I say Tequila Sunset along with a nice note from the Vogel's thanking us for inviting them to share with us Christmas, New Years and a nice week. I was so thrilled they were with us and I hope they can come be with us again soon, maybe when we go to London since they missed that part of their trip this past summer because I got sick in Stockholm. "Sweetheart, what do you think about having Steve and Bonnie join us in London when we go there next month?" "That's an excellent idea, Baby. See if you can get them to come over and join us. I'll bring them over on a private plane if they can or we could just pick them up on our way over. Definitely try to arrange that." "I will Sweetheart. When we get back I'll check the dates and see when they can join us." The ship pulls out of dock into open water as we settle in to watch the sunset. 

Wrapping me up in his arms, kissing my neck as the sun disappeared, "Baby, you look so stunningly beautiful tonight. I love you and all your beauty." I smirk, "No Sweetheart, not as beautiful as you. Truly, you are the most beautiful one in this pair." He sighs heavily, pulling his arms from around me and gently taking my face into his soft hands, "Baby, what more do I need to do to convince you how beautiful you are to me? I need to know why you don't view yourself as the most beautiful one. I love you unconditionally, and no matter what you do or say, I will still love you. Please tell me?" My eyes fell shut contemplating how to respond as my head slowly rocks back and forth in his hands. I lift my hands to his taking them off my face and kiss his fingertips with a light brush of my lips. Taking a deep breath and sigh, "Sweetheart, no matter how much you love me, I can't. This journey we are on is about love, not hurt. I can't tell you something that might hurt you when I love you." Looking at me in disappointment, "Baby, please tell me. It hurts me more not knowing. You are my love, my life and my beautiful wife." He is sitting there looking at me with those soulful, beautiful eyes longing for an answer to what I'm thinking, how I feel and his powers of persuasion are really hard to circumvent. Knowing exactly what to do to get it out of me, he is touching me in a way that is so gentle, tender and loving. If he had not shaved that beard off, all he would have had to do was put my hand on his face and I would spill my guts completely. 

 I gently take his hands off of me and stand up. I pick up my Tequila Sunrise and slam it back. Tilting my head to the side,[softly], "Sweetheart, look at me." He is touching my knee and it is sending shivers up my spine. I lean over to swat his hand away, "I said look, not touch." He leans back into the sofa, taking in all of me and I hear, "Um, um, um." In my sultry, low voice, "Stop right there. Don't say anything. That in and of itself is something I never heard before in my life, until it came from you along with telling me how beautiful I am. Never heard that before even when I was young. How am I supposed to believe it when I know all those truly beautiful, young women you have had and you find me more desirable when compared to that? I'm sorry Sweetheart. I love you, but it is your past and your patterns that haunt me. I know you are living in the moment and, right now, I am the object of your affection. What happens when I start to look my age and those young girls makes that thing between your legs start to twitch for something young and beautiful again? I know it's only a matter of time." If I get enough to drink, I'll tell him everything and then some. He is just sitting there gazing at me. Yeah, he checked out on that. I hope it did not hurt him too much hearing all that. He wanted to know, so there it is.