Sally can wait

too good at goodbyes

November 1996

Im at my whits end, honesty, Liams in a mood all the time, him and Noel are always arguing, Lennons getting away with murder all the time, Flo is sick. LIFE IS FUCKING STRESSING ME OUT.

Liam was trying god love him but the album was stressing him out and hes sniffing again, i dont know if thats whats stressing him or if its Noel.

Noel, fucking hell i want to punch his lights out some times. Noels gotten really bad with the coke. Megs been ready to smack him for weeks. Hes a good dad and hes helping her out with Anais but between him and Liam there both on the verge of a breakdown.

We know that them working on a new album stresses them out and all but theres a line and both of them are about to cross it. Its not like every day they sniff coke. There in the studio 5 days a week from half 8 till 9 sometimes 10 at night. Its a long hard day for them and both and if they're snoffing coke to keep em awake how can you say thats not allowed?

The other two days Liams too tired to do anything but lounge around the house. It was hard but were keeping out selves busy.

Liam goes out on wedensdays after the studio but he always comes home... last night he didn't come home. Noel said he left the bar around 3, i checked with all the band. No sign of him. And he didn't turn up to the studio.

We had been good for so long. We had been happy, i was genuenly worried. I had learned to trust him, i do trust him. Guigsy said he left the bar with some other guys including bonehead.

Bonehead said he went from the party straight to the studio and his slurring confirmed that. So now i have a missing boyfriend and no one knew where he was but he was drunk and high.

###

It wasnt the first time liam had went missing, he does it every few months and i get it, rockstars and temptations and im a fool for letting it happen but this time was too far.

He came in at 3:15. Still high, still drunk, stinking of perfume and lookong like a total mug.

"Where the fuck have you been Liam?" I asked. He looked at me with glassy eyes rolling.

"Around sally Jesus, im just in the door." He said putting his sunglasses on.

"Noels fucking livid at you, im livid at you, where were ya?" I asked. Picking up Flo from the floor before Liam tumbled over her.

"Sally, im shatterd love, i called Noel this morning and told him i wernt coming in." He said lying on the couch.

"What do you mean Noel knew?" I asked. Id been on the phone to him all morning he acted like he didnt know.

It was no use. The coke had drowned him out. He was now asleep. Not if i could help it.

I put Flo in her play pen, walked into the kitchen. Water would do but he was a drunken bastered and that couch was ugly any way, a full pint of beer went right over him. He sat up.

"ARE YOU MAD" he shouted.

"AT YOU I AM YOU PRICK" i shouted.

"What the fuck, you've lost it"

"Where were you last night"

"If i wanted you to know i would tell ya"

"TELL ME" I shouted.

"SALLY DROP IT JESUS" he matched my tone.

"Fine. Get out"

"What"

"If u dont tell me then get out."

"I remember this happened before and this is my house"

"Tell me"