Sally can wait

gin and toxic

May 1996

This was it. 3 days till my birthday and two weeks since me and Liam had it out with each other. We proper went for it, he slapped me, i slapped him back, he called me a selfish bitch, i called him a self centered prick. He threw a fit, i threw a vase at his head.

It missed, unfortunately, but after i threw it i felt so bad. I cried for ages, thank god Meg and Noel had the kids. We managed to talk shit out. Liam was back to being a dick but a dick that helped out more. Ibwas back to being a bitch, but a bitch thatbwasnt on his back as much.

He was still upset about something but i didnt know what. We sat up that night talking all sorts of shit about out furute and why we were together.

We decided it was best for us both to talk it out more and be more honest. I told liam everything. I told liam about feeling unwanted and trapped. He told me he always wanted me but things were tough right now. He was missing the band and the freedom he had on the road. He loved spending time with us but he was Liam Gallagher. He was like a puppy in a cage. If you didnt let him out every few days he would slowly die off.

I was movie tonight though. And liam wanted to stay in and watch movies. We usually go out since Noel and Meg took the kids but Liam insisted we stayed in. I was on the couch when Liam came in with some popcorn in a bowl. I smiled as he handed me crisps too.

"Stand by me or the goonies?" He asked holding up the tapes.

"The goonies" i said like it was an obvious question.

"Move over you slob." He said. Pushing me off the couch. I sighed and stood up before he sat down and plopping back down on his knee. He smiled and kissed my cheek.

Things have been tough and when we were bad we were fucking bad but when we were good. We were fucking amazing. I sat in his arms watching the movie. Liam laughing at everything Mouth said. Obviously.

I ate my pop corn, slapping Liams hand away every time he went for some. "You made me the pop corn, go and make ur own." I sighed.

"Just share you dick" he said i laughed shoving some pop corn in his mouth.

I laughed at all the parts i always laughed at. Like when mouth tells the woman theres sex toys in the attic and when Mikey kisses his brothers bird.

"You love this movie too much" Liam smiled. I just smiled and drank my tea and ate my pop corn in peace. Liam was fidgety at the end. Either out of boredom or because i was still on his knee. I sighed telling him to stop moving. He just sighed and took more pop corn. I was pissed it was some of the last pieces.

Just as the movie ended. Just as Roseileta finds the rocks I felt the bottom on my bowl. I sighed and dug my hand through the dregs of the bowl and then found something cold in it. It was metal. I frowned and pulled it out. My heart stopped. It actually stopped. This wasn't happening. It wasnt happening to me.

Liam smiled, getting up and looking at me.

"Please tell me your kidding me right now Liam Gallagher" i said. He shook his head and smiled.

"Im so sorry Sally" he said. "Ive been a total wanker lately i know that" he said. My heart went from not beating to pounding like crazy, he was mad. Absolutely mad.

"Sally i know i ain't perfect and ive been acting all stranger and fucking around and shit but i never mant any of it. It was all just a distraction because i was too scared you didnt want me." He said. I felt tears well up as he got down on one knee. My eyes flooding over. He looked pretty emotional too.

"Li," i said but he stopped me.

"I figured if i tried to push you away you would go and you would be happy but i realised you werent happy because i was making you unhappy. That's how i realised i need to do this" he said. He took the ring from my hand.

"Sally Ramos, will you do me the absolute pleasure of marrying me?" He asked. I was so overwhelmed. He was asking me to marry him two weeks after we nearly killed each other. Was he mad?

I knew the answer was the right one. It always would be and always will be. It was single handedly the hardest decition i had ever had to make in my life. Even harder than letting him back in. Even harder than leaving him in the first place all those years ago.

Liam was one of a kind. He always did say he would marry me one day abd we would have kids and live in the city and they would be just like me and him and life was begining to look that way.

I had a coice to make. I say yes. And everything i ever wanted comes true. I get the guy, the family, the fancy house and the rich husband that ive been in love with since all he had was a pair of shoes, a parka and a dream. But secretly i live in constant fear that im not enough for him and he will find someone else. That he is always messing around and i put him infront of my kids.

Or i say no. And i lose him and my perfect guy and my perfect life. But i still have my kids and my dignity.

Could i go through that? Saying no. Or even worse could i even force the words yes out my mouth?. I wanted to say the opposite of what i said but this choise felt like if i tried hard enough i would get over it. Liams face was a picture. Something that will stay with me for the .rest of my life but what was i to do? We couldnt keep holding this over put heads.

We had to think of the kids and what was best for them and this was it. This is what would ne best for them both.

"Yes Liam I'll marry you." I said. He got off one knee and pounced kissing me. I smiled as i held him. What was i thingking? Yes would always be the answer. He was my child hood sweet heart. He was my everything. I knew what it was like to live without him and fuck going back to that.