Shawn Mendes Imagines

the disk

1 month. that's how long she's been gone. she's not on vacation, she didn't move away, she's dead. sounds harsh, but it's the cold hard truth. y/n took her own life due to certain people. students that were in our class, family issues, even me. the boy that loved her so much that it hurt him was one of the reasons she isn't here, walking around on this earth anymore.

the shiny disk labeled with the black ink sat on my desk for the past 30 days. i didn't want to know what was on it, but i needed to know. i wanted to know what it was about, who it was about. was it about me? does it explain why y/n is gone?

i found the disk in my mailbox. ever since i found it, i can't stop thinking about it.

the curiosity of knowing what was on that damn disk got the best of me. i grabbed my laptop, put the disk in, and played it. i pressed play and closed my eyes tightly. my heart was racing in my chest, i was anxious and worried about what i was going to hear.

"Shawn," her voice echoed throughout my room. i opened my eyes to see her on my computer screen. she was sitting on the edge of her bed as she looked into the camera, "this is what you need to know." she pushed a strand of her glossy hair behind her ear and looked down at her carpeted floor.

"i loved you Shawn. you were the one i wanted to spend the rest of my life with. you made me a better person, before I met you I was a mess. I was getting in trouble with the law, sneaking out of the house, failing in school, but then you came along. you helped me study, kept me out of trouble, you were the reason I got better. but then something came up that you couldn't make better Shawn. I was sick. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to worry. Especially with everything you had going on at the time," she sighed a shaky breath, her eyes filled with tears, "i was dying Shawn. I didn't want to hurt anymore. That's why I'm gone. Not because of anyone, but because of the sickness. I hope you find someone that makes you happy, someone you see yourself with for the rest of your life. I love you Shawn." The screen went black showing that it was over. I sat there staring at the blank screen processing what just happened.

A tear streamed down my face. I shook my head and yelled, "no! No, this isn't fair!" I jumped up from the desk chair making it fall. I tugged the roots of my hair out of frustration. she should still be here. she might of been able to get treatment for whatever sickness she had, she could be the one i spend the rest of my life with. not 6 feet under the cold hard ground!

i collapsed onto the hardwood floor as sobs escaped my mouth. my body shook as i gasped for air, she didn't deserve this. she deserved the world.

This is depressing, but I kind of based it of 13 reasons why. I'm actually kind of proud of this.