Shawn Mendes Imagines

Mountains •six•

im about to sound like one of those cringy fuckboy musical.ly stars, 

but i want to meet every one of you and just sit down and talk 

i promise it won't be like tanacon 

too soon? 

whoops 

"alex stop," i said pushing his hand off of my thigh. 

"oh come on baby, let's have a little fun." he whispered in my ear as he kissed down my neck. 

"no," i said trying to stand up from the couch, but as i stood up he grabbed my arm and yanked me back down. 

"alex stop!" fear started to kick in as he pinned me down on the couch. i couldn't move no matter how hard i tried to push him off of me. 

"y/n i- you son of a-," shawn tackled alex. shawn got on top of him and had a fistful of his shirt as he pounded his fist into his face. 

my eye lids shot open as i sat up in the bed. my breathing was unsteady and sweat covered my hot body. i threw the covers off of me and ran my fingers through my hair. the flashback was a nightmare that i relived often. 

i swung my legs off the bed to touch the carpeted floor. i got up and walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water. the suite had plates, cups, and etc. i grabbed one from the cabinet and turned the faucet on. i brought the cup to my lips and drank the whole cup in seconds. 

"why are you still up?" i turned around to see shawn shirtless with just black gym shorts. i had to quickly looked away from his toned abs. i hadn't seen shawn shirtless since he was a scrawny teenager. 

"i couldn't sleep." i said putting the glass in the sink. "why are you up?" i asked. 

"i was thirsty." he said walking beside me to get another glass. i moved away from him and stood beside the kitchen bar. 

"well goodnight." i said after a few moments of silence. 

"wait," shawn said after i pushed myself off the bar. i turned my head to look at him. the moonlight shining in through the bay window in the living area made it easier to see shawn. his brown curls fell over his forehead, his eyes looked puffy and red. it looked as if he had been crying, "I'm sorry. I didn't want to just cut you out, I had to." His eyes met mine as he spoke. my heart was beating out of my chest, i couldn't believe he was actually talking about it. 

"when i was on tour i was a wreck without seeing you, i didn't think that i would make it through it again, so i decided that it would be better if i could just go ahead and stop seeing you it would make it easier on me. I know that sounds awful and i'm so sorry," he shook his head and looked down at the tile for a few seconds, "since our parents were always so close whenever we had dinners and stuff together i would want to watch the movies we used to and laugh until we couldn't breathe, but i couldn't. i know it's selfish and i feel awful. the past few years without you have been worse than when i went on tour when you were still my best friend. i understand if you don't trust me because honestly i wouldn't either." i took a deep breath and stepped closer to him. 

"shawn," he looked deeply into my eyes as i spoke, "i spent the past 2 years wondering what i did wrong. you  were my best and as pathetic as it sounds my only friend. i trusted you and love you. i wish i could tell you that i don't accept your apology or i don't want to see you ever again, but i can't." i confessed. he stepped closer closer to me leaving only a small space between us. 

"i love you y/n and i always have." he said softly as the moonlight made his brown eyes sparkle. 

i smiled a little and said, "i love you too shawn." 

don't worry this isn't the last part to this mini series