You don't control me, Dixon

➋ 28: The aftermath

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She looked at me for a second later then sprinted down the ravine. I cant worry about her, I need to get out.

I grunt as the walker seemed to be a thousand pounds. I cry out in frustration only to hear more footsteps. FUCKING A' LEAVE ME ALONE! The walker goes limp and goes crashing on my body.

I gasp, waiting for the walker to bite me only to have it yanked off of me. I go limp, walkers don't do that, it was human.

I gasp in relief as I look up to the person but I cant see them due to the sun glaring in my eye.

The person leans forward only to see Rick looking worried. A weak smile stretched across my face.

I hold my hand out to let him pull me up. He looked back at me and I nodded and let him pull me up and forced myself to relax.

Once I was up, Rick ran his eyes over my body checking for bites, I chuckle and wave my hand in a way of saying 'im good'.

He seems to accept this so I lean down and picked my knives that got thrown from my hands when I fell and ignore Ricks impressed look and slipped them back into their place.

Once I was done he looked around and asked: "Where is Sofia?"

I lean down on my knees and answer "I told her to keep the sun on her-her left shoulder".

He nods and places a hand on my upper back, leading me up the ravine side and back to the high way.

Carol and everyone was waiting for us at the edge. As soon as Alec saw me he hurdles the railing and pulls me into his arms, swings me.

I yelp and struggle against him but give up and lean into his comforting hugs. I tap him twice and he lets me go.

I look at the other and see Carols crying face and dread fills me. I whip around and blurt "Where is Sofia?! I told her to come straight here!"

The others look at me, Carol walked up and whimpered "You found her? Where is she?".

I couldn't look her in the eyes and I meekly answered "I told her how to get back? I'm sorry. I'm sorry"

I get ahold of myself and demand "We have to get back. Rick, pick whoever to come back with us."

I unzip my jacket showing my new toys and tossed it into the RV. I pull at the strap that twisted in the fall and straightened it out, once I was done I looked up to see Glenn, Rick, Daryl, and Shane.

I roll my shoulders and start at them, Shane looked away after looking me up and down.

I roll my eyes, creeped out, and stand next to Daryl. I look back at Alec who looks sad and shakes his head I nod and look back at the small group.

I know that is isn't him. He's strong and he's brave but he's out of his element in the woods.

I'm also not in my element seeing that I've only been in a few times before this all happened but I cant just leave her in there when I'm the one that told her to run. Daryl grunted and jumped over the edge and we followed easily, well Glenn had some trouble.

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Once we arrived at where I had Sofia was there the dead walkers were there, one the head still snapping. My lip curls in disgust, these things helped a little girl get lost.

I pull my new knife from the spine and slam it through the middle of the eyeball. I sigh and wipe the guts off of the knife then slide it in.

I hop down the ravine and kick the walker to the side, crouching at where I had hidden Sofia. I look back at the boys and announce "This is where I told her to hide as I took on the walkers"

I moved my head in the area where the two walkers were and continued "Then another one tackled me down here and I hadn't noticed that it was right where I hid her so when I had moved my sight as I was grappling with the damn thing I told her to run with the sun on her left shoulder. I had vaguely noticed that she had run down the ravine rather than up and out. I would tell you more but I was a little preoccupied with trying to not die. Sorry"

Daryl disregarded the last part and started out into the ravine but Glenn was standing in the middle in front of him Daryl. Daryl huffed slightly and snarked "Hey, short round, why don't you step off to one side? You're mucking up the trail."

I chuckle at him, making him look back at me and quirking a small smile.

I look back at the group to see Shane looking unimpressed, finally, he snarked "Assuming she knows her left from her right. Or even if Lucy know her right from her left, shes only a bit older than her."

I scoff and turn to him snapping "I know my right from my left and she knows. She understood me. Screw off."

I cross my arms over my chest and tilt my head. His eyes graze over me, I scoff and turn back to Daryl who was watching with flexed arms.

I flash him a small nod, he rolled his shoulders and went back to looking back to the ground.

Shane shifted his weight and scoffed "Kids tired and scared, hell she probably thinks Lucy's dead.".

I roll my eyes and looked to the sky, the sun is dipping into the horizon fast. I sigh and rub a hand through my messy hair. I should put it up.

Shane, not relenting, shook his head with a sarcastic smile and tried to convince us "She had her close call with Walkers, she saw Lucy almost die. Got to wonder how much stuck".

I stood my Daryl as he crouched by some indent in the mud, after staring at it for a second to two he looked up and stated "Got clear prints right here"

He looked up to me and stated, "She did like you said, headed back to the highway."

I nodded and looked around for the blue shirt that I followed. How could I let her go like that? Why hadn't I told her to use the knife I gave her.

I taught her how to. I shake my head and ran my hand through my hair, making it stick up in random places. I rub the back of my neck as the pressure builds in my chest.

This catches Ricks action. "Whats wrong?"

I roll my shoulders as I run a hand through my hair. I look at the others and state "I gave her my mum's knife, hell I told her how to kill one. By taking the knee out and slamming it right into the temple. Every time that I've seen her with a walker, she freezes. God,"

I run my hands through my hair as my breathing becomes heavier "Had I told her to stab the walker"

I hold my breath as I try to control by racecar of a heart until I could breathe easier "Had I thought faster of a better solution, this all could have been prevented."

I take a large breath before letting it out and looking at the others then shook my head then shook my head so hair fell in my face and look to my feet.

Glenn kneeled before me so he could meet my eyes and assured: "Hey, you did better than anyone of us."

I looked away and shook my head but sighed and ordered with as much confidence as I could muster, which is saying a lot due to me not having much, "We need to find her. I know she's alive. She's brave."

But ya know what my mum used to say 'fake it till you got it' but seeing that I've been lacking it for years I don't think I have any.
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