You don't control me, Dixon

➌ 61- Chained Like a Dog

♤

I groan and crack my eyes, I grunt as light hits my eyes. I try to move my wrists over my eyes but they clink mack and I snap my eyes open, yanking my wrists as I whip my head around, gray walls, grey floor, grey everything.

My breath quickens and I yank harder, a pinch and warm liquid down my arms, blood.

The door opens and I fall limp, my eyes falling. It wouldn't all be a dream, a
cognitive dissonance to get away.

"Lass?"

I crack an eye and practically gasp as I see his beard, it wasn't a dream. I yank at my wrists and look at him, he sighs and looks behind him, I strain my head up and see... Well, Everyone.

I slam my head back to the bed and watch as Alex winces.

"What ye symptoms?"

I grit my teeth and turn my head the other way and stay silent, only clinking my chains.

"Luce."

I snap my head over and glare at him, yanking my wrists harder. I'm fucking trying to say I DONT WANT TO BE LOCKED UP.

"It dinne up to me."

I roll my eyes and huff, he smiles softly and waves someone over. Hershel.

Great, just what I want.

He grabs my wrist and I yank it to me best of my ability, trying to fucking convoy that I don't want to be touched, but nooooo. He grabs my dirty wrist and holds two fingers to it, getting my heartbeat.

He furrows his brow and turns to Alec getting his. He sits back and nods to Alec, who in turn unlocks my wrists.

I pull them away from his attempts to rub the feeling back into them and shift away from them. Alec gives me a look.

"Lucy has a steady heartbeat, it shouldn't given her panic being tied up, Lucy, were you panicked?"

I look at him, he looks at Alec for a second to see if something is going wrong with me, like a science project. I glance at the others sit in soft conversations.

A dim one room, only one door and windows on all walls, boarded up. A shiver goes down my spine as the fire flickers brighter as Glenn looks over. His eyes snapping away like a bone under the teeth of a wolf.

"Lucy, do you know what happened? You were unconscious from eating a bite of meat."

I roll my eyes and shake my head. Of course I don't know. One day I got bit and now I can't stand meat. Isn't that good?

I make a face and snap my teeth.

Daryl suddenly barrels in with Rick in toe, their packs full, the smell of meat on them.

I wrinkle my nose and press my mouth into my bicep, worried about puking up whatever they have coerced into my body while I slept.

Rick stayed over there and passed the meat as Daryl nears, shoving the bag off his shoulders and opening it, a can of mixed fruits rolling out.

I eye it hungrily as my stomach screams for it. The men around me chuckle good-humored.

Daryl smiles and draws a knife, opening the can, moving away. I crawl forward and snatching it. Scarfing it down as the others stare.

When the last bit was in my stomach I smack my lips and wipe the juice. I push it away and clench my jaw, the others gaping.

As they drag on I roll my eyes and snap in a croak "Oh piss off, get your jaws off the ground, haven't you seen a girl eat?"

Alec laughs and asks "Mind ye talkin now?"

I click my tongue and nod slightly. "I'm not hungry for meat, it's like I can smell it like a mile away, and - well, there is one other thing."

The doctors lean in, I look over at the group that gape at my revelations, imagine what they'd do next, would they kick me out or-

"And? Lassie, ye keptin me at th' edge of meh set!"

I sigh and say bluntly and loud enough for the others not to eavesdrop "As long as I don't make noise- a cough or talking- the walkers don't see me."

The room fucking erupts, whispers and murmurs.

"So what are we going to do? It's not like I can just not eat. And we don't have enough constantly for me to eat like that."

Alec rubs his beard thoughtful like and mutter "I dinne ken But I will help ye, not a matter."

I nod and stretch my legs, my scarred ankle popping.

I slide my bare feet off the bed and the others look over. I ignore them and stand, wavering slightly.

I press a hand to the closest wall before standing in my own, the fire burning hotter.

I furrow my eyebrows but pick up my rig before Daryl and Alec rush over. "Uh, we didn't know what size you were so we were about to send Maggie and Beth our but-"

I blink at my rig, worn from constant wear and tear of running and fighting constantly. I hold a hand up and mutter "Can I just go? I'm fine on my own. Plus I need a new rig, a day at the most."

Daryl shifts and looks at my rig in my hand before turning my homemade leather band for my needle knives in his hand, clasping and unclasping the metal button "Yeah, it looks rough, I can-"

I clench my teeth and try to not hurt them or push them away, "Look, I can get there no problem but I worry that others will die, I've done it before."

Alec looks at me and narrowed his eyes "No, ye won't be on ye own. Dar-"

Daryl nods and tosses me my brace. I roll my eyes, clipping and tying everything on before walking past them not waiting as I open the door, wind blowing against me as people gasp.

It must be cold. I quickly close it and look at the snow slowly drifting down. I hold a hand out and watch as it melts on my hand.

The door opens behind me, Rick speaks quickly "You're not going out there."

I glance behind me and narrow my eyes, Alec and Daryl are here too, blatantly ignoring them. "Aren't ye cold lass?"

I turn around and shake my head, "Nah, well, I'll be back soon, best stay warm."

Daryl shakes his head and walks up to me "Nope, me and you are going, let's go."

I roll my eyes and shrug, looking at Daryl's poncho. He takes it off and offers it to me, I merely shake my head, starting off saying "Not taking the bike, we are walking."

He splutters for a second before following. His footsteps near silent with mine.

♤