You don't control me, Dixon

➋ 56- The Messiah is Classified as Weak

♤
I stand between the tallest of the group as Rick speaks of the old man. I might have not liked him at the moment of his death but I can't help feel responsible.

Maybe if I hadn't yelled at him to go. He wouldn't have gone into the grass. Maybe if I hadn't done into the woods when he asked me to, none of this would have happened.

Alec taps my arm gently and I brush my shoulder against his arm.

Rick shifts and coughs, trying to keep himself from tearing "Dale could-- could get under your skin." He chuckles softly "He sure got under mine, because he wasn't afraid to say exactly what he thought, how he felt. That kind of honesty is rare and brave."

I look at the fresh grave next to the others, Maggie's and Beth's family, Sofia, and a nameless grave, I had turned up the ground last night after I helped with Dales. My mom. She's buried.

" Whenever I'd make a decision, I'd look at Dale. He'd be looking back at me with that look he had. We've all seen it one time or another."

The group chuckles but I clench my teeth tighter, he knew about my past. And he died. Maybe it's not the knife that's cursed, maybe it's me.

"I couldn't always read him, but he could read us. He saw people for who they were. He knew things about us-- The truth Who we really are. In the end, he was talking about losing our humanity. He said this group was broken. The best way to honor him is to unbreak it."

Rick eyes Shane who stands stiffly across the clearing from where I am, "Set aside our differences and pull together, stop feeling sorry for ourselves and take control of our lives Our safety our future."

He meets my eyes "We're not broken."

Then moving to meet everyone's gaze "We're gonna prove him wrong. From now on We're gonna do it his way. That is how we honor Dale."

I continue to stand with the two by my side as everyone disperses. Rick stays as well, passing a look to Shane who glares at me before turning on his heel.

Rick turned to me and stayed silent as he looks at my free wrist. After having my cast soaked with blood and me groaning about it, Hershel caved and allowed me to take it off if 'I took it easy'. Like that's going to happen.

"Did Shane?"

I suck in a breath and cross my arms over my chest as I nod stiffly. He steps closer and a tan hand stops him, the red hairs on his arm raising.

I roll my eyes and place a hand on Alec, his chest grumbles but stops blocking me.

"Listen, I just wanna know if I tell you. you will do something. Because if not, then there's no reason." I shift and glance behind Rick where Shane is, leaning almost casually if not for his glare pointed at me.

I stare at Rick who shifts uncomfortably, I chuckle dryly and run my tongue over my teeth. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

I nod and turn on my heel, tears welling. I suck in a shaky breath before heading for my barn. The boy wasn't killed, they were close but he wasn't.

I wipe at my eyes as I enter the shaded barn, quickly scaling the latter to the upper level. I bring my knees to my chest and stare out through the doors as people pass by.

Going into the woods, moving cars, the camp moving. Suddenly Glenn pokes his head in, looking around.

"Lucy?"

I stay silent and glare at the hay, now they know, I can't face them. They see me as strong and capable. But now I'm just a coward who couldn't even tell her 'Friends' that someone hurt her.