Goodnight, love

You Loving Me

[A/N: Got obsessed with celestial references. Following posts might be of that.]

A million stars in a night sky,
There must be a limit on which you can count,
The number where you fall asleep to,
Even when demons roam the earth.

Sometimes I wonder to myself,
How much of those stars actually matter to you,
Am I one of the stars you count?
Or am I just another one passing through?

I am just one of a million,
There's so much people greater than I,
I am just an entity of stardust,
There are brighter ones burning fast.

I wonder if I exploded today,
Lost myself in my thoughts, my heart,
If I stopped breathing,
How much people would come to my grave?

Oh, princess will you be one of them?
Will you run after me one day?
My best friend in shining armor,
My knight who I'd lose one day.

Breathing silent,
And under my breath my thoughts race,
I wonder how much I matter to you,
I wonder if I even matter at all.

You tell me that you'd stick around until you die,
But honey, we're immortals,
And there's a bunch of people greater than I,
And no one knows why.

Life ever fleeting, fleeting fast,
Life never ending, stopping at last,
You will be there, you said,
You will stay here, you said.

But what if one day you run away?
Too good for me,
You're a shooting star flying under the sky,
My superman with a fire cape.

Someday I wish you'd take me with you,
But I know my weight you couldn't carry,
All those nice words,
And your pure soul.

Honey, you're too good for me,
I just hope you see that I am not fit for you,
Don't get hurt please, loving me,
Because it hurts me hurting thee.

I'm a monster, you see,
Selfish and ignorant,
Only caring for myself,
Not caring for you.

I follow my dreams and use y'all as stepping stones,
I climb up the ladder and go past all of you,
It makes me happy,
And I'm sorry.

I reach the stars every night,
Leaving all of you behind,
Not caring about your tear streaked cheeks,
Not caring about the hearts I break.

Why? Why me?
There's so much people to love,
So much stars to count,
But why pick me?

I who have lied to you,
I who I have broken your heart,
I who have made you cry,
I who am not worthy of you.

Why do you care so much?
Why can't you just forget me?
Why is it so hard for you to let go?
WHY DO YOU LOVE ME?

Every night I whisper to myself these questions,
Over and over again,
A never ending mantra,
A truth that isn't true for all o you.

You tell me that I'm great,
I'm awesome,
I'm a hero,
And I should never stop.

You tell me that I am going to be okay,
You hold my hand and help me breathe,
You stick by me,
WHY DO YOU STICK BY ME?

I am a demon,
A demon that cares,
Not for myself but for you too,
I'll do whatever I can for you.

Some nights you cry,
I blame myself for every tear,
For not being enough,
For not being a good friend.

But you pick me up time and time again,
Dusting my small figure off dust,
Arms wrapped in each other,
Runny nose and teary eyes.

You don't know how much I love you,
My shooting star,
My golden lead,
My lovely butterfly.

And I'll always be here for you,
Ready to get hurt,
Ready to bleed,
Ready to die.

In front of the fireplace we sat,
Shivering, I asked you,
"Princess, when will you leave me?,
When will you ride a horse off to never land again? And forget me?"

You held my hands in yours,
Whispering in a mellow tone,
Only one I could hear,
"Never, I'm never leaving you."

But what's so special?
About me,
Why do you stick that long?
Why don't you leave like the others do?

You didn't respond,
But you stayed,
Quietly,
In comfortable silence.

You became my firefly,
A candle in the night,
But I still shivered in fear that maybe, just maybe,
One day you'd leave me.

But tonight?
Tonight I'm sleeping,
Tonight I'm happy,
Tonight YOU made me happy, and you always do.

I don't understand you,
But I also don't care to understand,
For friends are friends and they don't need to understand to believe ,
They don't need to understand to love.

For I love you,
I love you, my best friend,
I love you, princess,
And I love you for loving me.