7:30 pm and I'm here, All alone, Under a blanket, Crying my eyes out.
I want to end everything, I want to end all, I want to end all the smiles, And rip this mask off.
I'm sorry I'm not who you think I am, I'm sorry that I'm not happy, I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was aching, I'm sorry that I only smiled to make you happy.
But smiling to make people happy isn't working, The broken are broken, The damned are the damned, And nobody can fix that.
I pretend to have a happy life, Dreaming of green meadows, Butterflies and all the dew drops, Doesn't help at all.
I couldn't help thinking that all these butterflies would die, The meadows will turn black, That the day would fade to night, And I'm not happy at all.
On earth, Angels are demons too, Kind hearts aren't kind at all, They just seem what they are.
Sometimes I dream that I'd be a bird, That I'd soar the skies, Only to remember that I'd fall, And break my bones.
That this life ain't what I'm looking for, They say that you should live your life, But life is a crappy game, However I live it you're going to loose anyway.
They say that you should be happy, But how could I be happy if I know that you're going to die, Perish, Join the forgotten.
It's better to live off, Not being remembered, Not pulling chords, When I finally disappear.
10:30 pm I stood up, I looked through the mirror, Eyes tear streaked, Rage surging trough me.
I didn't care, I punched the mirror, Until my hand bled, Until I can cry no more.
Hands dripping blood, Eyes dripping tears, I don't care, I couldn't care less.
I don't bandage my cuts, I don't wipe my tears, I don't heal myself, Because I'm all dead inside.
I smile because I want to make people think, That I'm not a monster, I'm not dead, Even though I am.
I want to be normal too, Even if I know that I can't, I'll never be, That I'm a monster with no heart.
That I've thrown my heart out, Far away, That I can't find it, No one would be able to.
12:30am I cried myself to sleep, Lulling myself, My heart singing, To the song of pain and misery.
When I woke up, It's 50 years later, I realized that my heart is still not here, Realized that I needed it.
I called for it, But I know it'd never return, It my be somewhere out there, But it's not beating.
It's numb, From all the pain, And the times people have stepped on it, The days I spend neglecting it.
It's too late, I know it's been misplaced, Eaten by the lions, And never to come back.
I lay on that bed alone and cold, I don't know how I survived years, Without a heart, With one I couldn't find.
I closed my eyes, I know it's too late, That I will not see it, Not with me breathing at least.
My breath slowed, Chest heaving ever so slightly, My vision blurry, It's almost the end.
My life hasn't been worth it, Should've listened to what other people said, Should've followed and played, And lost trying.
My heart returned, It's beating is shallow, I stared at it as my last minutes died down, As my breath flowed slower.
Reached out for it, Asking it to play one last song, The song it most desired, The song we most desired.
It played the song, Of how I grew up, How my mom would smile at me, And how I would smile back.
The song of the time before she died, When I was truly happy, When I wasn't dragged down, When true pain was almost non existent
I smiled my weak smile, Reaching a weak hand to feel it, Exhaling my last shallow breath, And the game is over.
The grim reaper took me, My soul in a jar, A smiling skeleton mouth grinned at me, Telling me that I won.
That even though I did lost, I still won, I ended the battle, I ended my battle.
That even though I didn't live happy, I ended happy, A grin that holds everything, Even if I died alone.
Life is a game, You would lose, But at least lose trying, And never giving up.
Living is for the brave, Losing is for the weak, If you're going to play the game of life, Die trying.
Put your heart on the trigger, Aim for the skies, Not for yourself, And you'd be fine.
Love is a treasure, Because once it goes, It'd never return, Never again.
All of us would leave, Dissipate, At least be happy, And smile.
Smile even if I know it's not for myself, Smile for others even if I know it's not working, Don't pull the trigger, boy, It's not going to set you free.
It's going to drag you down, It's a rock, And it's pulling you, And you must not simply let that happen.
You open your eyes even if you think it's not worth it, You take a deep breath and chase the demons away, You punch them till they don't see light, You'd be fine as long as you see it.
You stretch your wings and soar the skies, Don't let the huntsman stop you, Kid you are invincible, Stronger than the sun.
You will shine, Until you fade away, Until you can't, And people would be watching.
You'd be the strongest supernova, You'd be the brightest star of the night, You'd be the best warrior out there, Just try to keep winning.
Life is a game, There's no winning or losing, It's all in the matter of how you play it, And in the end we all end up as heroes.
Heroes and mischiefs, The blessed and the damned, The jailed and the freed, But we're all one.
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