So i do have something positive to say, but then all negative shit. I'll start with the good first since my last entry wasn't exactly all sunshine.
The good news is that I'm working on a music project and hopefully will drop it sometime in the following months. I want to make it as much like my poetry as i can, have you guys be able to listen to it, and be able to feel like I'm there for you like I feel when I write in here. The Project's cover is attached and I hope you all like it when its finished.
Now, for the negative rant. I got misgendered today by a teacher pretttty publicly and I don't think i've ever been more uncomfortable/embarrassed even though no one seemed to notice/care. I don't know. Honestly I want to just not have to deal with the problem (especially since he has ties within my family) and just skip class or some shit. I probably should stop being a sensitive fuck and just address it instead of whining about it, but it just sucks that he knows of my sister and I don't want to ruin her image more than I already sorta do with the rest of my family by association. I'm not going to whine about being a fuck up since it won't change anything.
I'm just gonna keep doing what i have been for the past two weeks: Not give a crap about anyone's opinion on me. If something makes me happy, i'm doing it. If something makes me comfortable or confident, i'm wearing it and I dare someone to would tell me to my face that I shouldn't. At the end of the day, I beat myself up too much as it is, and I refuse to let others join the fight again. Its been four months, and still no word from that therapist I contacted (I think its safe to say it's a no). I'm going to keep looking for one willing to talk, and focus on my music.
This entry was actually a lot more positive than I thought, so thats another good thing I guess lol. I literally went from sleeping the entire day to not deal with real-life, to being ready to push through it for two more years again. This book is really the only thing I know that can do that, so thanks.
Anyways, goodnight, sleep well, and stay safe <3 kick life's ass for as long as you can, its gonna suck for a while, but it'll eventually get better
