Two chapters in one day because you are all the best.
***
I had a miserable night at the plate. Zero for five, and I struck out looking twice. I didn't even come close to putting a ball into play. It was probably one of my most miserable performances as a Brewer to date.
"You all right, man?" Shaw gave me a pat on the back.
I shook my head. "Nah, man. I fucked up big time. I have to get out of here quickly."
"Annie?" Shaw asked. His face looked worried.
"Yeah, I asked her to marry me, and, just like you and my mom warned, it didn't really go very well." I sighed heavily. "I'm going to shower and head out. I need to see her. I hope she's still at the apartment."
"Good luck, buddy. I'm sure you'll both figure everything out."
"I hope so."
After showering, I sat in my car and stared at my phone. She hadn't responded to a single one of my texts, and I had sent about fifteen of them total. Mostly apologies. Some exclamation marks. A few emojis. One picture of a pug puppy.
I decided to text Hannah before leaving the players' lot. If anyone knew what was up, it'd be her.
Christian: Have you heard from Annie today?
Hannah: No, not at all. Why? Is she okay? Is she in a comatose state because she found out the baby is actually a boy? I thought she'd message me right away.
Christian: I fucked up. Also, girl. Definitely a girl. Eloise Christine Yelich.
Hannah: Please tell me you didn't cheat. I'm already thinking of ways to murder you in my mind. I'm thinking I'll wait until the deep winter . . . icicles . . . (YAY GIRL! Yay Eloise!)
Christian: Hannah, we live in Malibu. There are no icicles, you psycho.
Christian: Anyway, I did the opposite of that. I proposed. With a ring.
Hannah: Holy shit, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?
Hannah: THAT'S SO MUCH WORSE.
Hannah: WHAT THE HELL!
Hannah: CHRISTIAN, YA FUCK NUT.
Christian: I know, Hannah. I know. Now she thinks I don't love her, and that I'm just "infatuated."
Hannah: Well, are you sure you love her? Because she made it pretty clear she doesn't want to get married yet, and you didn't listen, ya fuck fart.
Christian: I know I love her. I love how good she makes me feel. I love how she hooks her finger around her nose when she's nervous. I love how she covers her eyes when she's uncomfortable with a breakup scene in a movie. I love that she's willing to have my baby. I love how weirdly slow she eats food. I love when she literally jumps up and down and claps her hands when she's excited about something. I love her face, her body, her complexities. I love her so much. Help me not fuck this up completely. I'm already failing, and Eloise isn't even here yet.
I slouched in the driver's seat as the tears hit. Yet again. I had to stop making us feel this way. It was mostly all on me.
Hannah: Wow, okay, Romeo.
Hannah: Where are you right now?
Christian: Sitting in my car in the Miller Park parking lot.
Hannah: Sounds super unproductive, ya fuck brain.
Hannah: If she didn't go to your game, I highly doubt she's at your apartment waiting around for you.
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Ghosts (A Christian Yelich Story)
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