Ghungroo - The Siren Call of Lovers (#2)

Chapter 63 - You and I

Song Credit- 'Him and I' - by G- Eazy and Halsey.

Final chapter people. Drum roll...

Chapter 63

Riaan loves me. So says Rahul. But is he in love with me?

Does he even forgive me for what I did?

I push all of these thoughts away for the rest of the day. I can torture myself with them later when I'm alone in bed tonight.

Rahul and Tina's wedding is magical. I cannot help but get lost in it and in them and their love for each other. The bridal couple are totally in love and I watch them exchange smiles and knowing looks throughout the day.

I allow myself just for this day to believe in love. True love. The kind that Rahul and Tina have. Theirs is an uncomplicated love. A love without a Stephanie or Jack lurking somewhere in its shadows. No betrayal, no sorrow or heartache clouding it's waters.

And just for today, this one single day, I let myself believe that I could have this someday. That some day I will find true love with all the fuzzy, heart warming trimmings.

Tomorrow, I can go back to being cynical and miserable.

Today I will allow myself to laugh and smile. Yes, seeing Riaan here takes my breath away. It is painful to know that he's right here in front of me, yet I can't go to him, hug him, or kiss him on the cheek in greeting, even.

We've been avoiding each other all day.

He is beautiful as usual, dressed in a well-cut black  suit, dominating the room with his presence. I am acutely aware of him. At every moment, I can feel him. Where he sits, who he's in conversation with, what he's drinking and even though I avoid him, I feel him crawl under my skin and fill my veins.

Apart from a few stolen looks, I don't look much in his direction. I'm too afraid to. I'm too afraid of getting lost in him, too afraid of falling apart...And I will fall apart today. I know I will, but not right now...Later. I can do that later when I'm alone.

By the time the reception rolls around I am changed out of my beautiful chiffon, turquoise sari and am in a simple, silky ankle length slinky dress. It's the prettiest shade of grey and is simple and comfortable.

I am both exhausted and elated. My feet ache from wearing heeled shoes for most of the day and my face hurts from smiling so much. All in all it's been a good day of celebrating and reconnecting with family I haven't seen in ages, some since my dad died.

Dhani is enjoying the attention from uncles and aunts who fuss over him. It's way past his bedtime and he is still dancing up a storm as he is passed from hand to hand to family members who want to cuddle him.

I find a quiet spot at the edge of the crowd and sit down at an abandoned table littered with lipstick rimmed champagne glasses and side plates with half eaten wedding cake.

My feet are sore and I slip them out of my heels and flex them out a little bit. Why the fuck did I use these torturous shoes? They were certainly not built with comfort in mind. I should not have allowed Tina to  convincince me to wear them. Tomorrow I will pay the price for wanting to look glamorous and six inches taller. Never again.

My eyes wonder through the crowd of merry makers dancing to the beat of some cheesy wedding track. So far I've learnt how to do the Macarena and the Electric Slide. Who knew my mother could move like that! I've kept up with them right up until that Chu-Chu train line dance thing they started doing that made me throw in the towel. I have to hand it to the older crowd, they sure have a lot of energy. It's hard keeping up with Kumari Devi and my mother. That's for sure.