For His Entertainment

Chapter Forty-five

My eyes scanned the view of the city lights blinking in front of me. From my hotel room, the city was overlooking. Red lights from the cars, neon lights from the billboards, and pastel colors from the commercial buildings. I remember a time in my life where this sight filled me with overflowing joy and amusement, but now I was starting to get tired of it.

I downed the last gulp of red wine and sighed. Tumalikod ako sa bintana at hinarap ang madilim kong kwarto, the only light was from the moon shining brightly outside my hotel room and the fluorescent light from the agape door leading towards the bathroom. I slowly took a few long strides towards the bathroom with the silk of my robe touching subtly my own soft skin I have spent thousands for.

Upon reaching the bathroom, my eyes landed on the mirror and a woman with pale face, pouty lips due to the fillers, heavily dyed hair, and artificial thick eyelashes welcomed me with a lifeless expression. I smiled slightly but even my jaw was hurting from all the fake smiles I've been putting for years so I immediately took it back.

And that wasn't the sad part. What's depressing is expecting your dream to fulfill you completely, envisioning yourself happy while succeeding, only to be bombarded by disappointment.

The hard part is realizing that living your dream isn't that fancy at all, the dream that have costed you literally every treasure in your life. Being slapped of the reality that being here isn't at all rainbows and unicorns.

Ang mukha kong puno ng kolorete ay halos hindi ko na makilala. My glam team always made sure I looked ready to kill the show, that I looked like I had enough sleep, that I looked always happy and energized, but deep inside, I was different.

I was alone and lonely.

But that wasn't what my management wanted and paid for. They wanted an Ally who can entertain the crowd, and that's what they're gonna get.

I removed my robe and it slid perfectly down my curves. Muli kong pinasadahan ng tingin ang hubad kong katawan, the body my 6 million Instagram followers have always envied and wanted; but the reality was I spent a fortune to curate the perfect body the society expects from a public figure like me.

I left the robe on the cold tiles and walked towards the expensive bathtub. I dipped my long manicured fingers on it to feel the water, and when I felt satisfied, I slowly climbed into it.

I grabbed my phone from the side and took a photo of my waxed legs, making sure that the bubbles looked aesthetic beside them. And when I finally had the perfect photo, I edited it to match my feed, and finally, I uploaded it on my Instagram just like how my manager told me to update my followers and not lose them.

Wala pang isang minuto, dinagsa na iyon ng maraming likes at comments. It used to amaze me how these people would do everything for me, who is just a simple member of the society; how these people would literally drive long hours and even camp outside my show's venues just to see me. But now, I was feeling suffocated by it.

Binalik ko iyong phone ko sa malapit na counter and just closed my eyes to feel the warmth of the water on my body. Dahan dahan kong nilubog ang mukha ko sa tubig until I can hear nothing but the bubbles popping.

I didn't know how long I've been there, but I was awaken when the doorbell rang countlessly. Hinilamos ko ang mukha ko gamit ang kamay and blinked a couple of times when I looked at the digital clock near the sink. It reads 6:08pm.