For His Entertainment

Chapter Sixty

My stomach was starting to twist in little knots, each second uncomfortable. Hindi pa man kami nakakalabas ng building ay alam ko na ang sasalubong sa akin. There will be a large crowd, especially now that my life has become a national concern. Alam kong bawat Pilipino ngayon ay ako ang pinaguusapan. I was already trending on Twitter worldwide before I deactivated my social media accounts, and even then, I can still hear their echoes in my mind.

"Malandi."
"Pa-victim."
"Cheater."
"Two-timer."

Halos mapatalon ako nang may maramdamang tela sa balikat ko. It was a jacket, draped around my bare shoulders. Hindi ko pa man nakikita ay alam ko na kung kanino iyon, sa pabango pa lamang. Napatigil ako sa paglalakad dahil doon at tinitigan ang pinanggagalingan ng pagkakasuot ng jacket ko.

"I'm sorry, Margarette," Spencer said in a soft voice, as if embarrassed of himself.

What he's sorry for, I didn't want to know. A part of me wanted to hold on to the comfort of the jacket, but a bigger part of me just doesn't want to look at him in the eye. Not when everything is still hurting me. Not when every part of me just feels so fragile. Para bang kaunting galaw niya lang ay nasasaktan ako sa hindi ko malaman na dahilan.

I was scared. I was scared of him being here, because that would mean he can leave anytime—the same way he left me before. And I don't think I can handle any more of that.

"Kuya," I croaked.

"Hmm?" Kuya Steven stopped on his tracks to look back at me. Agad niya akong dinaluhan nang makita si Spencer sa tabi ko.

"I'm not comfortable having him with us," I said and removed his jacket on mine. I shoved it on his chest without waiting for him to catch it. Hindi ko tinitigan ang kan'yang mga mata. Hindi ko na hinintay pa ang magiging reaksyon niya, I turned my back on him and started walking a few steps away from him.

"Spencer—"

"I know, bro," pain and regret was evident in Spencer's husky voice. "I heard what she said. But I'm not leaving. Not anymore."

Pinikit ko nang mariin ang mga mata ko. Ang pagkabog ng dibdib ko ay hindi ko alam kung saan nanggagaling, but I was sure it wasn't because of him.

"I don't think you understand, Spence," Kuya sighed in frustration. "You don't get to have a vote on this anymore. You need to leave her alone."

Mabibigat man ang mga paa ay pinilit kong magsimula muli sa paglalakad.

"I'm not doing that, Steven," matigas na sambit ni Spencer.

"Don't make me force you," Kuya Steven answered. "For the last time, leave."

"Stop." I turned to face them again, my voice shaking from keeping myself tearing once again. "Stop fighting. Please. Spencer, just leave."

"I'm not leaving you," he took a step forward pero agad siyang hinarangan ni Kuya.

"You already did once, why can't you just do it again?" I bit the inside of my bottom lip.

"Margarette—" he attempted to take another step but Kuya didn't back down. He was clenching his fist and ready to punch him anytime he takes another step forward. Pero iniiwasan ko iyon. I didn't want any more violence.

"Leave." I repeated, my voice echoing on the hall.

His jaw clenched but his eyes didn't part mine. Para kaming naglalabanan sa titigan, and I was fighting back with all the strength I have left. The silence around us was deafening, and I was starting to worry that he might hear how fast my heart was beating. But if this is the last thing I'd do, I'd do it.