Joanne ~ Back in time

Chapter 48~Have faith

{Joe's POV}

I called Dianne, it went straight to voicemail where I left the message "Di I love you and I want you to know that I'll never stop loving you" I waited an hour then left another message "Di please call me my life had been ruined because of how I acted and treated you please come home I know we can fix it"

I was snuggled up on the sofa with a blanket and the fire on yet I still wasn't warm. I wasn't warm because Dianne was my warmth. Dianne, Macklynn and Eponiné are my warmth. I love them. I have no idea why I reacted the way I did I want more kids with Dianne but just not yet but so what if fate speeds our life's up a bit. Will I ever see Macklynn and Eponiné again? Am I still their dad? What the hell have I done? I was getting desperate I needed Dianne. She always knew what to do when I was panicking and how to calm me down. I picked up my phone and called Dianne again she didn't pick up. I left another message this time I was crying all the way through so I have no idea whether you can hear what I'm saying or not. "Please come home, I don't care whereabouts you are or where we go I just want to be together I need you Di, I want you, please come home please"

I have spent the day curled up in a ball on the sofa and now I'm in bed. I don't want to annoy Dianne but I know I need to tell her how I feel I left the last message of the day "Hey D it's me again I hope your okay sorry that's stupid question I guess I just wanted to say that I will do anything for you to come back or I can come to you but please pick up your phone and call me I know I don't deserve to know but please let me know that your alright" I fell asleep after what felt like eternity...

The week passed by. I slept the week away. I only woke up to check if Dianne had called or texted me and to eat. I had barely eaten this week to be fair. I suppose I've just been sleeping so much I just haven't used any energy so I just haven't been hungry. It's Saturday and I've been awake for three hours and I still don't know what to do with myself. I've wondered around the house then I wandered around the garden, now I have found myself on the sofa with my guitar in hand singing.

Singing doesn't feel right without Dianne and I know I don't always sing duets with her but she's always there. Dianne's always there for me sometimes I'm singing to her, other times she's in the crowd and other times she might not be in the room but I know where she is in case I panic or need her help. Now I have no idea where she is and if she is okay. Seriously what have I done? I thought I could fix it and I thought everything would go back to normal in a couple of days but it hasn't. Yeah, I'm still alone.

There was a knock at the door to which I quickly went and answered.

J-"I'm so, oh"
Adisha-"Expecting someone else"
J-"Yeah Dianne"
A-"Well I came looking for her where is she"
J-"..."
A-"Where's Dianne"
J-"She left"
A-"What do you mean she left"
J-"I mean she's gone and she won't answer her phone"
A-"She was supposed to come and get them and they were supposed to spend the day with you, Dianne was keeping it a surprise for you"
J-"..."

Both Adisha and I took a seat on the stairs. We both looked down at our feet both of us trying to hold back tears.

A-"You know this is the first time Dianne has ever missed anything of theres"
J-"Really"
A-"Yeah she turns up for everything doctors appointments, school plays, parents evenings, collecting them from my office she does everything and No one ever did anything for her until she met you"
J-"..."
A-"You made her happy you know you changed her life, you changed all of there lives you gave Eponiné a dad for the first time. You gave Macklynn that father figure and dad she has been longing for her whole life... you gave them a family... you gave them love"
J-"Yeah well now Dianne's gone"
A-"She'll be back"
J-"Yeah how do you know that"
A-"I just do"
J-"I wish I had the same feeling"
A-"If I was you in this situation I would do what Dianne would do"
J-"Yeah and what's that"
A-"Keep the faith, have hope because you're her world and she's yours, you will always be drawn back together because you changed each other lives much"
J-"..."
A-"You were like a good bump in the road for her"

I laughed a little if I'm honest I don't know if I have the energy to laugh properly.

J-"What do you mean"
A-"Well bumps in the road can be good because they slow you down but if there's a lot of bumps the road will begin to change shape"
J-"and"
A-"and you changed the shape of Dianne's road for the better before it was this very twisty dangerous road and some days would be good and others would be horrible now it's the road is more straight and every day is amazing"
J-"It used to be but the past few days well they've been sh*t they've been more twisty and dangerous I think that road you're talking about didn't change shape I just had a little bit of straightness before it was twisty again"
A-"I've got a feeling that your wrong"
J-"I hope your right anyway all these sayings and riddles are confusing me"
A-"Okay I'll stop"
J-"Yeah"
A-"Are you going to go back to school any time soon"
J-"How did you know I wasn't at school"
A-"The school called"
J-"But you're not my social worker or Dianne's anymore"
A-"I know but the school thought I might know where you guys were"
J-"And what did you say"
A-"That there was some business with Macklynn and Eponiné that needed to be sorted out"
J-"Thank you"
A-"What for"
J-"Covering"
A-"What have you been doing the past week"
J-"Sleeping and leaving many messages for Dianne"
A-"So not much then"
J-"I just feel so helpless"
A-"Yeah and your acting it to"
J-"I always liked your honesty but in this situation, I really don't"

We both laughed.

A-"Anyway I best be off, I will go and tell Grant and Peter not to expect a visit from Dianne anytime soon"
J-"Yeah thank you Adisha"

Tears rolled down my face slowly. It's almost like I didn't have any energy to properly cry either.

A-"Have Faith, everything will sort its self out"
J-"Yeah"
A-"Stay safe Joe"

I nodded. Adisha drove off. I need to have faith even if it's hard because if I don't I might not make it out alive. Heartbreak can really kill.

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Check out my other Joanne stories:
•The Wedding Planner
•Strictly Love