Abducted; Namjin

Chapter Fourty One

Jung Hoseok

"You look lost."
I don't bother turning my head from the window, gazing blankly out into vast space. Idle wandering how far from home we are.
The worst part is I don't know if I'm thinking about Earth Median Blue. What is home? Do I even really have one anymore? I don't know what to think.
A hand drops down onto my shoulder making me jump. I glance over to see a somehow familiar face. "Are you alright?"
    Jooheon. His name is Jooheon. Namjoon's brother. The captain of this ship. "Do you care? You brought me here, right? You knew I would definitely not be okay but still insisted. Why bother to question it now?"   
     He smiles, scratching the back of his neck. "Are you upset? I gave you a choice, right? I simply offered and you accepted. Are you angry about that? I would want to know if I were in your position. You felt it, right? Knew something was missing and wrong in your life..."
    Scoffing, I take him in. "I highly doubt that you were being so courteous. What's your endgame in this? I don't understand the point of it all. You went out of your way to torture your brother, right? Why? What do you get out of this?"
     His smile only widens and he steps closer. I refuse to flinch or back off as his hand comes up to caress the side of my head. "Maybe I do have an endgame in this. I do have my reasons and perhaps they aren't so innocent but that remains to be seen."
     Eventually his proximity is too much and I step back, accepting defeat. His hand drops. "Where's your sidekick?"
     His brow furrows. "Are you talking about Hyungwon? What of him?"   
     "He's in love with you, right?"
     Confusion colors his expression. "Is he? He's loyal to me but I harbor nothing of those emotions for him I'm afraid. I saved him and keep him around to be of use."   
     I'm disgusted. "You're fucking awful."   
     He looks delighted, on the other hand. "Am I? Maybe. Why are you so concerned for my love life? Interested?"    
     I'm so mad I could spit in his face. Rage builds in me making me clench my fists to avoid assault. "Fuck off. I'd rather be sucked out into space then to let you touch me."   
     He laughs. "Fair enough." His eyes trail slowly over my body. "I was always jealous of what you and Namjoon shared. Together since childhood only to grow into lovers and whatnot. It's so uncommon and hard to find such a relationship...tell me—how does it feel for all that to be thrown away so easily for someone else you cared about deeply? Does it hurt more that he chose Jin over you?"
      Hatred bubbles up to the surface but I contain it. Barely. It's not hate towards Namjoon or Jin. It's hatred of the whole fucking situation. How fate could so thoroughly fuck us over like this. 
    And to have this little bitch mock me over it? I want to kill something. Namely him.   
    I give him a cool look, unbothered. "I'm happy for them. May the fates be kinder to them and their future."
     I have the immense joy of watching shock cross his face before he's neutral again. Fucker.   
    "You can't be serious? You actually give them your consent?"
     Rolling my eyes, I begin walking towards my room. He follows, unfortunately. "They don't need my consent. We were over a lifetime ago. They can be happy with or without me."  
     It seems impossible for him to wrap his mind around the concept. Frustrated, he grabs my arm, tugging me to a stop at my door. "I don't get it. I thought you loved him? How can you just accept it like this? It's disappointing."  
     I force my hand free from his. "I really don't care how this makes you feel but I guess it's something you just can't understand. I do—did—love him. I love them both. It was over between us. Why shouldn't I step aside? We were never going to be together again regardless."
      His lips part several times but nothing comes out. He truly looks perplexed, observing me so closely I feel self conscious and I hate it.   
     "Can I be alone now?" Hinting for him to back the fuck off and go away.
     Sighing, he leans forward and pins me to the door, his hand raising and catching right above my head. I have the sudden mental image of every 'bad guy' in movies doing this to an innocent girl they like and want to laugh. Surely this isn't going to be like that, right? I'm a guy too. 
     He licks his lips and smirks. "So if you are completely okay with them...then you are open to someone else, right?"
     My eyes widen in shock and humility. No way. He's coming on to me?! I choke back a laugh and push him back. "You're barking up the wrong tree, my dude."  
      He frowns. "What...what does that even mean? You aren't a tree. Barking?"
     "It's a human phrase. I'm not interested in you so please just leave me be, okay? Go look for Hyungwon."  
     "You know...the more you resist the more tempted I am to own you."
     "Own me? I'm not property. You could never." Insulted and heated.
      He raises a brow. "Oh? You didn't mind being Namjoon's property, though? He considered you his like he does Jin now. It's how we work in case you've forgotten. He always saw you the same way. His real estate to maintain." Snorting.
     My face pinches a bit. I don't want to admit it but I think he's right. I loved Namjoon with everything I had but I never really thought about being his 'property'. I loved being his and having him take care of me. He worked our future and I let him do everything pretty much. Maybe it's my new earthly human perspective but I don't like it. Not at all.
      I can't even disagree with him. "That was then and this is now. I'm a different person this time around and I refuse to be owned by anyone or thing."  
     "But you will let your best friend become property to someone else? How valiant." Mocking me.  
      Glaring, I lose the temper I've worked so hard to suppress. I shove him hard against the wall and grab his shirt collar. "You need to stop before I fucking lose it for real. Let them go and take your fucking ass far away from them."
     Chuckling, he reaches up and around to the back of my neck and jerks me fully against his body. "And what about you? Do I have to take myself far away from you, too? How about a deal? You stay with me...I'll take them wherever the hell they want and never bother them again." Teasing.
     My grip loosens just a bit. Seeing my weakness, he rushes forward—still holding me around the neck—and drags me into my room and onto the bed. Holding me down with a strength I hadn't realized he possessed, he slams his lips down on mine stealing my breath.
     I'm on fire.
     I'm enraged. I'm embolden and angry and and...and...
     He pulls back, panting down at me while I attempt to catch my breath, blinking up at the ceiling. He grabs my face and kisses me again, softer this time.
     "Think about my deal. We can work something out, don't you think? You really aren't going to stay a third wheel to them forever, are you? Don't you want your own life now?"
     I don't watch as he strides out of the room. I don't think about how sore and bruised my lips are. I don't let myself remember how it feels to be manhandled down on the bed so thoroughly.
     No.
     I hate him.
     It's never going to happen.
     After a long time, I turn my head and gaze out of the window leading out to space. It's vast and so so dark. I can see my ruffled reflection and the stupid shiny tears glistening on my cheeks.  
     Third wheel...
     That hurts and I hate that it hurts but it does.
     I hate it more that he's absolutely right about me not living my life because it's so intertwined with theirs.