Wdw sickfics

D.S- melancholy; pt. 2

*this chapter has imagery of self harm and suicidal thoughts 5. if those topics are triggers for you I recommend not reading this chapter for you own safety.*

no pov

now that the boys knew about Daniels 'condition', they started paying closer attention to him.

watched his attitude.
watched how he socialized.
watched his appetite.

and also watched his painting collection.

they may have liked seeing the new paintings but they knew it wasn't good to see new ones. it meant he was hurting.

they never saw a full episode. his breakdowns, the tears, the panic attacks, him crying himself to sleep, wanting to hurt himself.

they never seen it. they only saw him secluding himself from everything.

there was a door in their way that they couldn't get passed like Daniels brothers could.

they need to get passed the door.

~~~

Daniels pov

its frustrating lying awake in my bed. I could not get a single amount of sleep.

my eyes wouldn't shut. the thoughts wouldn't stop swirling in my brain. I couldn't get comfortable.

it got too a point where I paced my room to tire myself out. 

I wish I could go to my brothers. they were out of town, so that's a no-go. i wanted to call my parents but I didn't want to wake them up. I didn't want the boys to see me in this state of mind. 

I'm confused.

I want to know why I'm like this.
I want to know what causes this.
I want to know how to fix it.

do I go to the boys? or no...

I hopped back in bed after an hour and tried again.

finally falling into a restless sleep.

~~~

I'm glad were all on a break but I'm not at the same time.

I'm glad I can stay in one place but I wish I could have something to distract myself.

music distracts me but with the break, there is no more music.

I woke up numb. everything is just... fuzzy.

a knock came from my door, creaking open slightly.

"hey..." Zach said as he seen me awake.

I just waved my hand.

"you okay...?" he asked hesitantly.

I only shrugged. I know I'm not okay but I hate to admit it to someone i love so much.

he came and sat on the edge of my bed with a smile.

"want me to stay with you?" he ran a hand over my shoulder.

"kind of ..." I whimpered.

"then scooch over. ill keep you company." he smiled.

I moved over for him to slide under the covers with me. we both laid on our sides facing each other.

"want to talk?" 

"I don't know."

"hey its okay. what's going on? I will listen, you can talk."

"...have you ever just felt so low? like there wont be anything after you go to sleep? like all you can do is cry the pain away? I get this way with no reason at all. I just end up sad, for a while. it hurts me because I'm worrying everyone. but its not like I can stop it all." I ended up crying.