Through Thick and Thin (Anthony Rizzo)

First Time

Jazmyn

Today was the start of the wildcard round which was a best of three series. The playoffs are totally different this year, or so I'm told, I wouldn't really know because I didn't follow many sports when I was overseas. But the boys get to play at Wrigley so I'm all for this format.

And through a lot of hurdles and jumps I was invited to Wrigley to watch the first game from the press boxes. That was usually for media and the baseball operation people, but they were honoring the military for today's game since they couldn't do a lot of things they usually do for veterans and I was who they asked to come celebrate with.

So I dress nice because I'm told that's how you dress up in the boxes. I pull on a red dress with long sleeves and a open back to cool off with. I curl my hair and do my makeup a little. I have to laugh because whenever I got ready for military responsibilities I wasn't doing all of this, but times were changing. I, was changing.

Once I was satisfied with how the look turned out I head to the ballpark. Anthony was already there getting ready for the game and I stayed back at the apartment for a little to get ready myself. Once I get there they take me up to the boxes.

As soon as I get in I head to the window and look out over where all the magic happens. The field was amazing, especially in late September. They had "black lives matter" painted onto the field and the ivy was beautiful, just like Anthony said it was. I smile big as I take it all in.

"Have you been here before" the man who was showing me around asks me and I shake my head.

"No, but I've heard the stories. I know about the bleachers and what they're like when the stadium is full. They can make it feel like the whole world is shaking when someone on the team hits a home run. I've heard about the celebrities who sit in the crowd as a fan, as one of us, and just enjoys the game. And of course I was told about the great things they've done for veterans here" I assure him.

"Are you even a veteran anymore" he asks making me laugh.

"At this point, not really. I'm a veteran to the army because I was honorably discharged from there and am no longer a part of that branch. But I only had about five more years of that anyway. The guard allows me to still be a part of the country I am working to protect and be here with Anthony in the city" I explain.

"Well we're lucky to have you. You know, my daughter was at that protest you were at. You guys actually talked a little and she got to know you. She was one of the people you saved that night and we think about you all the time. It's a honor to have you here and still be able to have my daughter around too" he explains.

"Your daughter is Stacy" I ask.

The smile on his face told me the answer but he tells me anyway. "That's her" he nods.

"You have a wonderful daughter. She's so bright and empathetic. Being white and speaking out against racism is hard. People tend to question your motives, but to me there shouldn't have to be one. You don't have to have black friends or a black boyfriend to want to defend these men. It shouldn't be about making up for racist problems someone had in the past. This movement is for the people like your daughter who can look at something and know it's not right and have the courage to do something about it. You don't have to be a solider to see how important those kinds of protests are. There never truly is a good time to fight, you know? She might be young but she has a hold of her future and she is fearless, you raised a wonderful young woman" I assure him.

"Thank you" he smiles. "I can only hope you inspired her as much as you inspired a lot of people that night."

"That's how change comes, moments like that where we realize this isn't something to be indifferent about. There's right and wrong and we need to chose a side. Now who is right and who is wrong is a matter of perspective. Of what you know and what you're willing to believe. But it's time we all had our own opinions and thoughts instead of those of our parents and their parents before them. We live in a different world but seem to have the same problems. My hope is that change, real change, can come from how awful this year has been" I insist.

"I don't know if that's possible" he admits.

"I'm not sure either. But I have hope. Hope that when we look at the person next to us we can find the things we love within them, not the things we hate. That we can celebrate our similarities and differences. There's so much more to life than we will ever know looking for problems in things. Hope is the only thing that keeps me going. For without it I would be pretty lost. But I found hope here, in this city, in this incredible ball park. And I hope that it stays" I smile.

"I hope so too" he smiles back.

Eventually it gets closer to game time and the players come out to the field. Anthony looks up in the boxes and I wasn't even sure if he could find me. He was so excited I could finally come watch him play even though no one else could come. But he told me the stories, we watched the games post season games from 2016. I got to see what this place is like in a game of this caliber. Though I still don't know everything there is to know about baseball, I knew enough to know that this place was special and I was honored to be here.

The game comes and goes and they end up losing. I wasn't really sure what to expect with Anthony after this game. He doesn't like losing and doing it at home in the post season certainly isn't a good thing. He didn't have a hit and they didn't have a lot of time to figure it out either. So I collect my things and head on home then wait until he got back. He gets in around 6, a few hours after the game ended. He doesn't say anything as he walks into the kitchen. He wraps his arms around me before resting his chin on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry" he starts and I look at him weird.

"Sorry for what" I wonder.

"I wanted to get a win for your first game at Wrigley but I didn't even get a hit" he sighs.

"Baby, you don't need to get hits to make me proud. I know what you went through to even get here. To win the central division while holding it together for us off the field too. And that's not even taking into consideration all you do at the hospital.

I am so proud of you" I promise

"Really" he squeals as I laugh at him.

"Really really" I assure him.