The Scott's

Adult Problems,Kid Situations-Auden

I'm laying in bed, staring at my wall doing what every does trying to fall asleep, think about life.Thinking about the fact that Emery is no longer living with me, my very own sister isn't living with me.It's crazy to think that we we're once a happy family, scratch that.My mother, my fatherland I were a happy family and Emery even though she was there was never happy.

Then there is Danny, one of the most complicated things in my entire life.I know my sexuality but I don't think he knows his and it scares me.The entire month we we're in our safe little bubble, everything was really intimate and romantic because it was between just us.Those stolen glances in between our classes, the way he invites me over to 'study' when in reality the only study we are actually doing is the study of our tongues massaging each other.I love all these moments but then there are the other types of moments.

The moments where he is coming to my house high off his mind or really drunk or even sort of beat up.Just like that, my phone begins to ring and it's actually Danny.

"Hey Auden."He says into the phone.

"Hey.What's going on?Why are you awake?"I rush the questions out of my mouth into the receiver which earns me his beautiful laugh from him.

"Nothing is going on.Why do you always assume something is going on?Can I not call my lover-boyfriend or whatever the hell we are in the middle of the night because I really do care about him."Did he just?

"Lover-boyfriend?"I ask.He just called me his 'lover-boyfriend' and all the questions flood into my mind.Do I want that for myself, to be his lover/boyfriend?He represents everything I have avoided in my 11, almost 12 years of life.The uncertainty, the unknown,the passionate are all things he represents and things I have managed to vigorously avoid.

"Everything I had said and that's what you got from all of it Aud."He laughs and I can imagine he is rubbing his temples in disapproval.

"I don't know...It's just we have never really stood in a specific place this month in our relationship.So hearing you say that just caught me off guard, that's all."

"So what i I told you that I like you a lot Auden and that I have never felt this way about anyone before, in my entire life."

"Never?"

"Nope."He pauses for a moment, taking in my silence before picking up a conversation again."I know you don't believe me Auden."I don't respond because he is right,I don't believe him,I want to but I don't.He is so unstable about literally everything, he will be sharing cute glances with me to completely ignoring me and then calling me completely plastered."I want you to be able to believe me though."He pauses for a few moments longer,leaving us still in this very uncomfortable silence."Meet me tomorrow after school, at our spot.You know what I'm talking about baby?"

I nod as if he can see me before responding "Yes."My breathing hitched.He just has this affect on me like no other has ever had.I had never been one to have crushes at all, yet here I am swooning over the very troubled boy on the other side of my phone line.

"See you then Aud."He dismisses and hangs up the phone and after that.Sleep suddenly becomes very easy to obtain, dreaming about those hazel eyes that are constantly stealing glances at me and making me feel important.

***

Next day, after school.

I'm sitting under the bleacher waiting for Danny to come to our place.We always came here before classes, in between classes, lunch breaks, and after school.We had some of our best make out sessions in this very spot, talked about some very deep things.Well,I talked about some very deep things most of them having to due with Emery and he would just listen, not talking about anything to due with him.I want to get to know him.It's so crazy and mind gobbling that I feel this endless connection to someone who I barely even know.