Taoist Master

An Honest Conversation

Like a woman drowning and seeking only to fill her lungs with what little air he had left in his lungs, Bai Qian hungrily lathed his mouth while her hands roughly forced him so hard into the wall behind him, that Mo Yuan knew if he didn't take control, he might actually lose it.  

It wasn't all that difficult to figure out his feelings for her and where he definitely wanted this kiss to lead, but going by the way her hands were gripping his shoulders tightly when her kiss suggested she wanted far more, said she was inexperienced and for Mo Yuan, that meant he had to slow it down.

His hands were still on her waist having barely caught her when she threw him back, so very gently he slid them up the sides of her body until he reached her elbows, then easing her back while continuing to allow the kiss to last a little longer, he then edged her back a fraction while also easing himself away from the wall to better control the situation.

Waiting for her to draw a breath, he then slid his face to the side and slowly began to kiss down the sides of her neck towards her shoulder and back up again.  Little tingles shivered up her spine as he kissed and nipped his way up to her earlobe, then gently suckling on it while her body trembled in his arms, he then pulled back altogether before gently but forcefully pulling her into a tight embrace to bring it to a halt.

Resting his cheek against her own, he drew in a deep breath while waiting for her to calm down.  She was gasping for breath and her arms were gingerly edging behind his back and though he could feel the disappointment in being made to stop, he also felt her quietly settle into his arms as if grateful for the break so she could get her head together.

"Can I take it to mean that you want me here?" he asked once she had settled down and felt ready to talk to him again.

She didn't say anything for a while and Mo Yuan didn't push.  Instead he continued to hold onto her until she felt ready to pull back to look up at him.  There were tears in her eyes and she looked so conflicted that Mo Yuan couldn't help but feel a sense of guilt for putting her through this, but he had to if she was to admit her feelings and then accept them.  And the moment she was ready to speak, she quietly pulled back completely to lead him to the sofa so they could talk properly.

And so for a time, that is what they did which was all Mo Yuan wanted.  She might have the quick tongue when it came to debating Taoism, but when it came to herself, her words tripped over themselves as she tried to convey what it was she was feeling without embarrassing herself anymore than she had already done.  Or at least, that was how she was feeling even when he gently placed an arm about her shoulders to anchor her.

"You're right......" she whispered against him.  "I am afraid Mo Yuan.   I have never loved anyone before and I have never considered myself to be loveable.  In fact, marriage was something I never wanted for myself, I just wanted to lead my people quietly and without fuss.  But since meeting you, I think those feelings are beginning to change." she openly admitted which did make him smile for the first time in days.  

And not so much for her confession, but the choice of words she was using.  She had said 'love' not 'like' or even 'fond of' but love and though he didn't think she realized she had even used that word or exactly how he would take her confession, he saw it for what it was.  She was in love with him and his smile widened at the epiphany.

"However, I am still unsure of where this is all heading.  I know your feelings for me go beyond a mere friendship and it is this that worries me...." she added before stopping to take a deep breath while his hand tightened about her shoulders.

She may have been unsettled just a few minutes ago, but he could feel the determination and courage pick up as she steeled herself for a truly heartfelt talk.  Her shoulders rose a little beneath his arm and her face took on a seriousness as she carefully weighed her words.