"The Storm In Our Souls"//FILLIE

Chapter 19.- "Fireproof"

"My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways

Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life

Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made, oh

& it haunts me every time I close my eyes..."

"I really need a drink...". Sarah headed for the kitchen, quickly returning with a bottle of wine.

"Well ... I guess this works".

It was wine that she used to cook, Sarah didn't really drink so she didn't have a variety of alcohol in her house, the scene was almost funny in Millie's eyes, she couldn't help a smile from appearing on her face despite all the crying that let out the last hour, Sarah used to be a calm person most of the time but apparently at this moment even she was feeling overwhelmed, Millie had told her every detail of what had happened with Finn and now it was evident that she was trying to assimilate all the information and relax a bit before giving Millie some advice.

"I thought I knew all about Finn's emotional secrecy, I knew he was dealing with things, but this...". She said taking one more drink from the bottle. "He really let this go too far... I can't imagine what he must have felt all this time bearing guilt this big... something that wasn't even real... knowing that the pain that has plagued him all these years was caused by himself".

"So... you think I was rude to him?" Millie asked

"No sweetheart, don't misunderstand my words... discovering all this must have been difficult for Finn, I know... but he wasn't the only one affected, all this time he dragged you and the others with him... especially you ... his decisions caused this and the fact that he is a victim does not exonerate him of his responsibilities, you are right to react as you did, you have every right to be upset and hurt ... "

"I'm so confused... on the one hand I'm so worried about Finn, it broke my heart to know the suffering he's carried all this time, even if he could have prevented it, even if all this confusion is his fault... it hurt me to see him like this , so broken ... but on the other hand I ... ".

"You're hurt, he hurt you ...". Sarah said perfectly understanding Millie's feelings.

"Yes ... I was hurt by his lack of trust in me ... we were both broken when we met but I decided to be vulnerable with him, I know he tried and I accept that he had some advances, but finding out about this ... find out that he preferred to silence something that tormented him and destroy the harmony of our lives than just to trust me! ... that is too much for me ... I can't spend the rest of my life wondering what other things he is hiding from me, what other pain is keeping in his heart, being afraid of the day that everything inside him will accumulate and explode... that is a risk that I would have accepted before but now... I can't ".

"No ... now you can't, enough emotional roller coasters, I understand you and you are doing the right thing." Sarah said putting a hand on her belly. "I love Finn as if he were my son, but now he really ruined things... he had all the love in the world in front of him, so many people willing to help him and he decided to close the door, that's a very ungrateful way of treating people who love you... well, I don't even want to say anything about the Misti-Com issue! ". She turned to put the bottle on the floor and walked over to Millie taking her hands in hers.

"Millie, sweetheart ... I hope that has not made you doubt your talent, you are wonderful and everything you have achieved is on your own, I have known you since you were a baby and you are the most capable person I know ... do not underestimate yourself, because I don't and even though I'm extremely angry with Finn... I know he doesn't either ".