In Another Life

Chapter 1

Y/N POV

Everything hurt. My thighs ached. I clenched my jaw just to suppress the whimper that fought to escape. Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, my eyes narrowed as I looked forward. I needed to focus.

The sound of horse hooves against the damp ground surrounded us as the female titan closed in. My teeth clenched as I focused on my horse. My knuckles had turned white from gripping the reins too hard.

"Y/N, stay focused! You're starting to drag behind," Oluo shouted from the center of our formation. The reins made a sharp snapping sound as I sent my boot into the side of my horse, pushing forward to bring myself closer to the Captain.

My lips narrowed as I took in the man. Still, he remained a mystery to me. It had been three long, rigorous months of training. I had killed myself to make Special Operations. I had been handpicked by the Captain himself, and yet, I still wasn't sure if he was aware of my presence.

Outside of our daily training and time spent in the Mess hall, I didn't really see too much of the man. I knew he held the title of Humanity's Strongest soldier, and I knew what that entailed. But outside of that, the Captain seemed to keep to himself.

The corner of my lip twitched, the horses continuing to push forward. I shook my head in frustration as my mind continued to wander. Over those three long months, I fought to come to terms with it—I had feelings for this man. What a stupid girl.

I bit down on my lip as I focused on keeping my horse straight. It was stupid, really. I knew it, yet it never got easier. Not when I heard gossip about him, about the girls that came and went to his quarters. And not when I heard that another member of my squad shared the same feelings I did for our Captain.

But unlike me, Petra didn't hesitate to express those feelings and desires to him. She had stayed late last night after our debriefing for the mission outside of the walls. The last thing I managed to see were the Captain's eyes locking with mine as Petra reached out, running her hand down his forearm as I closed the doors shut behind the rest of the squad, leaving the two of them alone in the meeting room.

The sound of screeching cables shot past my ears as wires flew behind the horses. Cannon fire sounded off as the Commander yelled orders. Three other sets of cannons went off before a horrid screeching filled our ears, indicating that the female titan had been caught.

"Everyone hitch your horses and switch to ODM gear. I have to break away. Oulo is in charge until I come back; get Eren back to base. Newbie, you're with me," the Captain waved a blade at me, directing me to follow.

Releasing a cable, I followed the Captain up into the trees as he navigated through to reach the Commander. Levi and the Commander continued to go over the plan as I stepped aside and gave them their space.

Standing beside the Section Commander Hange, I swallowed hard, gripping my blades as I glared down at the Female titan. Raising my head, my eyes locked with his. Levi held them for a moment before dipping his chin at me, as if he were asking me something.

My lips formed into a hard line before I nodded back. I was ready, as ready as I'd ever be. I didn't have much of a choice in it. He pulled his gaze from me before he sent a cable out, landing on the Female titan's head. He stomped down, sending a blade down into its skull before he began to taunt her.

My eyes narrowed further as I tried to make out his words. He taunted her for another minute before she released another scream, but this time even louder. The ground rumbled, the sound of tree branches snapping echoed around us as titans closed in all around us, heading directly for the female titan.

My jaw ticked, teeth clenching as I felt one of my blades snap clean off as my wires pulled me past the nape of a titan's neck. "All hands withdraw!" Commander Erwin called for a retreat as we all pulled out.

Landing on a nearby tree branch, Captain Levi's boots slammed into the wood a few inches beside me. He sheathed his blades before coming to grab ahold of my collar, yanking me forward to meet his eyes.

"I am leaving you here with the Commander while I go back for the others. You are to retreat with the rest. Can I trust that you can follow the order I've given to you?" My eyes looked back and forth between his before I gave him a quick nod.

"Yes, sir." He nodded once before releasing my collar and taking a step back. He pulled two new fresh blades before releasing another cable into a nearby tree, leaving me to stand there alone.

"Y/N, are you hurt?" My leg hung off the end of one of the wooden carts as Hange made her way over to me. She had been clearing all of the men and women for injuries. Raising my gaze once more, I looked around for my squad. Still, they were nowhere to be found.

My lips tightened before I forced myself to answer the Section Commander. "Yes, I'm fine, thank you, Hange. I have a few scrapes but nothing I can't fix on my own when we make it back." Giving her a half-hearted smile, my eyes closed as I nodded at her. "Really, don't trouble yourself with me when others are in need of your expertise."

She gave me a quick nod before turning and making her way over to a nearby wagon with a screaming soldier in the back. She pointed to two other men to hold the screaming cadet down as she pulled herself up into the back of the wagon.

I looked away just as the Section Commander shoved the cadet's shoulder back into its socket. My eyes caught something off in the distance towards the treeline. Pushing myself up to stand, I looked out into the field.

Eren, Mikasa, and Captain Levi raced towards us on horseback. Eren was unconscious on the back of the Captain's horse as Mikasa trailed them with worried eyes. Hange stumbled forward with supplies, helping the Captain get Eren down off the horse as they came to a hard stop at camp.

"Levi, where is the rest of your squad?" Hange questioned him as Levi got down from his horse to sit down on a nearby rock, his leg bleeding at the knee. Hange was quick to drop a knee, taking his knee between her hands as she rolled it from side to side.

Looking up, my eyes met his before they narrowed, shaking the Section Commander off. "It's fine, four eyes, just leave it." He barked the order to her, and a second later, she raised her hands, pushing herself up to stand.

"Gone, these two shits managed to stay alive, though." Levi jerked his chin up in the direction of the two lovebirds that sat in the back of a wagon, holding onto one another.

"Everyone return to base; this was a shameful defeat, and we have lost many lives. Clean up and take tomorrow off." The Commander spoke over his shoulder, mounting his horse as he gave the order to head back to the walls.

Breathing in deep, I sighed out loud before making my way over to my horse. I made it as far as getting my boot up into a stirrup before I felt someone's touch on me. A hand held my elbow, pulling me back into their chest as their lips met the shell of my ear.

"Once we make it back to base, come with me." Levi's lips grazed my ear as he spoke, leaving flames in its wake. His hand lingered for a second longer as he breathed in, taking in my scent. He released his hold on my elbow before stepping back and allowing me to finish mounting my horse.