In Another Life

Chapter 16

Y/N POV

Running my fingers through the long straight strands in Kaneki's hair, I smile. He looked so much like his father. Sharp features and all, he was Levi's spitting image.

I feel Levi's eyes on me from across the room. We hadn't spoken much, not any more than necessary on our ride here. He arrived alone at our home this morning. Walked directly past me to load our bags before picking Kaneki up. He didn't bother himself with locking up; he simply placed Kaneki in the back of the wagon before walking back up to the house, taking my bag from my hand, and dragging me along with him to the horses.

I sit on the edge of Levi's bed for a moment longer as I watch Kaneki sleep.

Standing up, I turn, meeting his eyes.

He leaned in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest with his ankles crossed, just... watching me.

I breathe in deep. I was here now; we'd have to talk eventually.

Bringing my hand up, I scratch behind my ear as I drop my head, walking past him and leaving our son to sleep in his father's bed.

I take a deep breath, walking across the room as I hear Levi close the door quietly behind us.

"Look, I know yesterday was a lot for everyone."

He walks past me, coming around his desk to sit in the leather chair behind it. Taking a seat, he locks his fingers behind his head as he stretches and takes a deep breath, meeting my eyes with a cocked brow.

I ignore it, closing my eyes and rolling them before I open them back up again. If we reacted the same way we had last night, we would never get anywhere.

Opening them, I meet his gaze.

"I am sorry you had to find out Kaneki was yours under such circumstances. That was not fair to you nor the ideal way I would have liked to have had that conversation.

He nods once, both brows raising as if I was telling him something he wasn't already aware of.

I push forward, taking a step forward and then another until I am standing directly in front of his desk.

"I hope you understand why I decided to do what I did."

His eyes narrow as he removes his hands from behind his head, leaning forward in his chair. He lays his forearms flat on the desk.

"I can understand why you would be hesitant to tell me, considering what you had endured that night. I understand that, but everything else... No, I don't understand why once you had him and you could see the resemblance in him, that he was unmistakably mine... Why did you not return to the scouts with him? Why did you not return to me?"

I stand there a little shocked, staring down at him as my lips part.

Shaking my head slightly, I force all those thoughts out, everything that I wish I had said that night.

"Do you really blame me?"

I scoff, bringing my hands up to my hair as I look at him in bewilderment.

He holds my stare, glaring right back at me as I speak.

"You fucked me in the barn after the mission that cost us the entire squad. Knocked me up and then told me not to think anything about it and said we should fill desires when they present themselves."

I look at him as if he were crazy. He had to be. I press on.

"You then stopped me on the way back to my room the night after I was brutally raped in the alleyway of the bar to drive the knife in deeper-"