ARE YOU MAN ENOUGH?

Chapter Twelve

Year 2017…

LILY COULDN’T SLEEP. Paano kasi, siya ang nasa kama ng lalaking tumulong sa kanya.

At nasaan naman ang lalaking nagpakilalang Jared sa kanya?

‘Yon. Nagtitiyaga sa sofa sa salas ng flat nito.

Patagilid siyang sumandal sa hamba ng pinto. Mula sa kwarto, tinanaw niya ito. Pinagmasdan. She saw this gorgeous face touched by the soft yellow light from a nearby floor lamp. A thick patterned dark blue duvet covered him up to the chest. With his head tilted to the side, some strands of his hair fell on his face. Dahil din sa posisyong iyon, parang nakaharap ang tulog na lalaki sa kanyang direksyon.

Chivalry is dead. I am sure, may gustong kapalit ‘tong mokong na ‘to kaya tinulungan ako.

Inekis niya ang mga braso, hindi pa rin inaalis ang mga mata rito.

Pero ano? He seemed… well-off.

Her eyes narrowed. Gradually, an idea came to her. Parang sumikip ang kanyang dibdib.

What if… hablot niya sa bandang dibdib ng suot na sweater. From her long-sleeved top and pleated skirt, she already changed into a pair of black leggings and an oversized pastel pink sweater.

Nagmamadaling bumalik si Lily sa kwarto. It wasn’t right to snoop around someone else’s house and stuff, but she just had to make sure. Para rin ito sa kaligtasan niya.

Napadpad si Lily sa study table roon na puno ng patong-patong na libro. May nagkalat ding print-outs ar brochures. As she checked them one by one, she only saw one similar denominator.

Lahat ng iyon, may kinalaman sa psychology.

I think he’s a student. Natulala siya saglit bago bumalik sa pinto.

Lily sighed in relief upon seeing Jared, still asleep.

Does he want sex? Because that’s all I can do to pay him back. Tinitigan niya ito ng mabuti.

Damn. He’s so damn hot.

Nagsusungit-sungitan lang siya sa lalaki kanina para pagtakpan ang nararamdaman niya. That hair that reached his shoulders looked so gorgeous on him. That handsome face…

Imagine staring at that face while he’s fucking me. My, I will cum too soon… I will cum too soon…

Takam na nakagat niya ang pang-ibabang labi. Her eyes continued to study Jared.

Nakakainis naman ‘yong kumot. Wala ako masyadong makita sa katawan niya. Balot na balot na nga siya sa sweater at jeans…

Then she felt guilt. Bakit pinag-iisipan niya ng ganito karumi ang taong bukal sa loob na tumulong sa kanya? Bakit pinagnanasahan niya?

Where’s the respect?

Nilukob siya ng panlulumo. Shut up, Lily. Get real. You just want to fuck him to see if you’re still good at it. You’re only doing yourself a favor not him.

Hinaplos ng awa ang kanyang dibdib.

Maybe he just wanted to help. Lalo na at psychology student siya. For sure, he’s one of those people who wants to just help. Someone who has empathy.

She paused. Ewan ba niya, pero parang gumagwapo ang lalaki sa kanyang paningin.

A psychology student. Siguro nababasa niya sa mga kilos ko na isa akong pariwara. Maybe he wants to see if he can talk me out of my plans… I can’t let that happen. I can’t let him stop me.