This Hurts Like Hell - Mayans MC

Chapter Forty-One

"Hey" he murmurs as the door swings open.

"Hey" I reply, my voice flat, letting out a sigh, I watch as his lanky frame leans against the door frame. His eyes rimmed red.

"Can we talk?" his voice hoarse as his eyes plead with mine.

I contemplate tossing him on his ass but I know that won't do me any good, sighing I just shrug stepping aside letting him enter the room.

"Going somewhere?" he nods towards the mess of clothes on the floor.

"Not anymore" I retort, walking back to the bed sitting down, wrapping myself up in the blanket.

Angel rubs the back of his neck, sliding onto the floor, his back against the bed, not looking at me.

"Where did we go so wrong?" he mutters putting his head in his hands.

"When did we ever go right?"

He tips his head back, looking at me, "we were always on the right path, You are my whole world, and I fucked up, I'm sorry" he pleads tears welling in his eyes.

"Angel, you got your girlfriend pregnant, you lied to me, and you're the one who left me remember?" I say fighting back the tears "I can't do this anymore, I am not this person, I hate who you've turned me into"

Angel crawls up the bed, facing me "I never wanted any of this happen, all I want is you"

"Don't lie to me, you're too good of a man to walk away from your child Angel, that baby shouldn't have to carry your sins"

"I want to make us work" he begs

"I don't" I tell him, pushing everything I feel down "Angel you need to let me go"

"I can't, I love you" tears spilling down his cheeks.

"You love the idea of me, but I can't be this person, I can't be in the middle of all this shit all the time"

"So what? You're just going to pretend that I don't exist? You're just going to leave me?" Angel's voice raising, his body shaking as he jumps off the bed. "I love you Charlie, does that fucking mean nothing to you?"

Sighing, I stand up, my hand reaching for his face, he flinches.

"Angel I need you to think of the future, what is left for us?" I say shaking my head "We are chaos and destruction, I can't do that to you, your child or the club, once this is over, I am leaving and you need to accept that"

"Fuck that" he bellows, his fist colliding with the wall "I am not walking away from this"

"You don't need too, but I am"

The door flies open, Tranq standing there, taking in the room and Angel.

"I think this conversation is over" Tranq says reaching for Angel, Angel shoves past him, storming out of the room.

"You okay?" Tranq asks, checking me over but keeping his distance.

"Yeah, just keep an eye on him" I say with all the tension leaving my body as I let out a breath.

He just nods, walking out of the room, closing the door behind him.

I turn off the light, climb under the covers and once again let the tears fall, I don't know how long I am like this, my eyes heavy but drifting between awake and asleep.

I'm vaguely aware of Sabella leaving me food and water, trying to get me to drink, but all I can manage is tiny sips and sleep, I pray for this pain to leave me, I pray for forgiveness, and I pray I did the right thing.

Night turns to day each and every time I open my eyes, I want nothing more than to leave. I drag myself into the bathroom, throwing up, nothing but bile. I drag myself into the shower, the water doing nothing to clear my eyes of tears.

Drying myself off, I put on fresh pyjamas and climb back into bed pulling the covers back over my head, I feel Sabella slide into bed with me, her hands rubbing small circles on my back. She's whispering to me, but I hear nothing.

I start to drift off, praying tomorrow hurts a little less.

BOOM.

The whole house shakes, I feel Sabella shoot up next me, jumping off the bed she opens the door and looks into the corridor.

I have no idea if I am dreaming, everything feels hazy, smoke feels my nostrils.

"Charlie I need you to move" she screams at me, dragging me out of bed.