I've Been Watching You All Night

Chapter 39

An hour later, they were both woken up by Doris's loud cries from the other room. Harry moved to go get her but was stopped by Louis's hand on his arm. "No, baby. You put her down for her nap so it's my turn." Harry reluctantly nodded and collapsed back on the bed as Louis put his pants on and walked out of the room. The young lad listened closely as Louis whispered quiet things to the girl. The older lad walked back into the bedroom with a sleepy-looking Doris bundled up in his arms. "Hi, Dor. Did you sleep good, darling?" Harry made grabby hands for the little girl and Louis handed her over.

"I changed her nappy so she smells nice and fresh now." Harry giggled and tickled the girl lightly under her chin. She started to perk up a bit, which made Harry's face nearly break with how much he was smiling. "Haz, hate to spoil this, but maybe you should put some clothes on. Don't worry, I'll hand her back." Harry gave the girl back to him and stood up from the bed. He went through Louis's dresser, pulling out some boxers, sweats, and a t-shirt. The boy put them on and then reached his hands back out for Doris, who Louis handed back to him. He settled the girl on his hip and looked at Louis happily.

"You fit this whole thing so well." Harry hummed. "What thing?" Louis pinched his cheek and ran a hand through the girl's red hair. "The whole taking care of a baby thing. You're gonna make such a good dad one day, I just know it." Harry smiled, but it was a sad smile. "I want this for my future. I want it so bad." His voice was shaky and it caught Louis's attention. "Haz? Are you alright?" Harry sniffled and nodded, but he wasn't fooling Louis. The older boy stroked his arm softly. "Baby, tell me. What's wrong?" Tears pricked the boy's eyes and he shuddered a bit.

"Here, I'll go put Doris in her crib and then I'll come back and we can talk. Is that okay, love?" Harry nodded and Louis took the girl out of Harry's arms. He rushed to put her down and came back in to find Harry in the exact same spot. "Here, bubba, come sit down." He took Harry's clammy hand in his own and sat him on the edge of the bed. "Talk to me, Haz. I want to fix this and make you feel better, but I can't do that if you won't talk." Harry sniffled and wiped his nose, looking at Louis with teary eyes.

"I want kids so bad, Louis." Louis smiled. "So do I Hazzy, but why does that make you sad?" Harry shook his head. "You don't understand Louis. It's not just that I want kids. It's that I can't have them." Louis furrowed his brows in confusion. "Baby, just because you're gay doesn't mean you can't have kids. There's adoption and surrogacy." Harry shook his head again, tears flowing freely down his cheeks. "If that's not the problem, baby, then what is?" Louis was lost. What was making Harry so upset?

"Haz, you know you can tell me anything. C'mon, bubba." Harry sighed and looked at Louis with a pitiful look on his face that made the older boy want to cuddle him and protect him forever. "I want a baby in my tummy," he mumbled quietly. Louis lifted his chin. "What, baby? I couldn't hear you." Harry whined and spoke up. "I want a baby in my tummy." Louis smiled and pet the boy's cheek. "That's it? That's what's making you so upset, baby?" Harry frowned and stood up. "I'm serious, Louis. Don't make it seem like it's so funny." Louis dropped his smile as soon as he saw the look on the boy's face.

"Haz, I'm sorry, I just thought it would be a more serious problem." The younger boy stomped his foot on the ground. "It is serious! Louis, I want to get pregnant so bad!" Louis wrapped his arms around the boy but he thrashed out of his grip. "No, you don't understand. I've wanted this for so long!" Louis shushed him and pet his soft curls. "Okay, baby. I'm sorry." Harry looked at him with pleading eyes. "Do it, Louis." Louis stroked his cheekbone with his thumb. "Do what, baby?" Harry opened his arms wide. "Get me pregnant. Please, Louis, wanna have a baby in my belly so bad. Wouldn't I look so good with my tummy all stretched to hold a baby?"

Harry was babbling as Louis just stared at him. He reached out for the boy and shushed him. "Haz, you know I can't do that." Harry whined in the back of his throat. "Why not, Louis? I'm a good boy, I'll be a good mommy. Fill me up and put a baby in me." Harry started to strip his clothes off but Louis stopped him. "Harry, you can't get pregnant. Okay, baby? It's important to me that you know that. No matter how hard we try, we just can't make a baby. It would be my dream to put my babies in you, but it just can't happen." Harry sobbed into the older lad's shoulder. "Why, Louis? Why can't I have a baby in me?"

Louis kissed away the tears on his cheeks. "You just don't have the parts, baby. You have to have a uterus to have a baby in you and you just don't have one." Harry whined and dropped to the floor. "Wanna baby!" Louis's heart dropped even more at the sheer pain in the boy's voice. He felt so bad that he couldn't do anything to help Harry. "Haz, shh, you have to calm down. You're gonna make yourself sick. C'mere, gimme a cuddle." He held his arms out and the boy crawled into his lap, curling into his chest.

Louis held the boy close as loud sobs racked his body. He was so distracted by Harry's upset state that he didn't hear the loud footsteps coming up the stairs or the loud knock at his door. "Louis is everything oka- Oh my God, Harry." Louis turned around and shook his head at his mum. She understood and left the room, shutting the door behind her. "Haz, can I get you all cleaned up, baby? I don't want your tears to dry on you." Harry nodded into the boy's neck and he carried him into the bathroom across the hall. Louis set the boy on the closed toilet and wet a warm rag, wanting to make Harry feel comfortable. "I really am sorry, baby. I would do anything to make you happy, but this I just can't do." Harry nodded and sniffled quietly. "Want me to take you home?" Harry didn't reply, just put his thumb in his mouth.

"Oh, lovey, don't do that, it's not clean. I'm gonna take you back to my room and we'll get settled in bed with my computer. Is that alright?" Harry just stared at the wall, still unresponsive. Louis just sighed and scooped the boy back up, kicking the door to his room closed behind him. He tucked the boy under the covers and grabbed his laptop from the desk, opening up Netflix on it. "What are we watching?"

Harry slipped his thumb back in his mouth but Louis grabbed it again, shaking his head. Harry whined but obeyed. "Sofia the First?" The boy had the sweetest look on his face that he just couldn't refuse. Louis smiled and pecked the boy's forehead before searching for the show in the kid's section. He hit play and laid back, not paying attention to the show at all. He had a much better view of the small boy beside him. The one that giggled cutely whenever something funny happened in the show and clapped his hands at the parts he liked the most. He loved his precious boy, and there was nothing else to it.