Temptation [ Min Yoongi | ENG ]

S E V E N T Y F O U R

I woke up relatively early despite staying late talking to Bram and helping him sort out his things for him to take from my house.

I took a long shower, until the tips of all the fingers and toes were wrinkled and yet I got out without feeling like it. I drank my tea and ate two small tangerines. I found my phone on the nightstand, properly connected to the charger cable.

Dirk de Graaf

Roos
Are you going out today?
10:13

Dirk
No, why?
10:18

Roos
I'm going to spend the day with you today.
Tell Lotte.
10:28

Dirk
Ok... what time are you coming?
10:28

Roos
I'm leaving my house now.
10:31

Lotte opened the door for me when I arrived, her swollen face let me know she would still be in bed if she could, but she was curious why I texted Dirk and not her.

"I love you, Lottje, but I need to speak to Dirk today." I explained, increasing her curiosity.

"You can leave your things on the sideboard, we're still eating." She said and I obeyed her, following her to the dinner table.

"Good morning Roosje, what's going on." Dirk spoke after swallowing whatever was in his mouth. I sat on his right and leaned over the table, resting my forehead on its glass top.

"Bram broke up with me."

"He did?! Why?" He exclaimed in disbelief. "You were fine yesterday, right?" He continued after my silence.

"It was because he thinks I need to find out if I still love Yoongi."

"Still?" Lotte asked in surprise. I shrugged my shoulders without moving my head, still glued to the table. I sighed and stood there in silence. "And is that why you need to talk to Dirk?"

"With me?"

"Yes," I said, finally getting up. "I think I need to talk to you to see things from your perspective."

"Why for mine?"

"Because you are his best friend."

"But I'm not going to tell you anything that would compromise his trust in me."

"I would never do that, make you betray his trust. I just need your perspective."

We were silent for a few moments until Lotte returned to eating. After a while we started talking about other things.

Dirk got up from the table first and headed down the hall, disappearing through one of the doors. Some time later he came back dressed and with damp hair. He sat on the couch and took the remote, turning on the television.

"Do you want to watch something?" He turned to me who was still sitting at the table.

"I want to, but nothing scary." I said getting up and sinking next to him on the couch as Lotte disappeared to the same place where he had disappeared earlier.

We had already seen two films and Lotte was dozing off on one of the sofas when Dirk turned down the volume on the television and turned to me.

"Whenever you're ready to talk to me about what you want to talk about, I'm ready, okay, Roos?" His big blue eyes were friendly. I agreed with a short movement of the head.

"I don't know how to start."

"Ask me any question, we start from there." I contemplated his suggestion for a few moments.

"Right." I smiled still uncertain and remained silent.

"Are you all right?" he took the initiative.

"Yes... apart from the fact that my boyfriend broke up with me last night, after six months together."

"How was it? Did you fight?"

"No... we were talking normally and when I realized we were talking about Yoongi..."

"Hm?"

"He wanted to know if I still love Yoongi and I didn't know how to answer him. He said I should find out, because he thinks Yoongi still loves me and the mixtape was for me." Dirk did not answer me, provoking me to continue. "Dirk, was the mixtape for me?"

"Roos... what do you think?"

"At first I thought it could have been, somehow everything was very familiar to me. But then I kept feeling it was too presumptuous for me to think he would do something like that for me."

"You are one of the subjects of the mixtape, yes. It is not presumptuous to conclude this, Roos. That was very clear... but I think the mixtape was for him and not for you. "

"What do you mean?"

"Yoongi knows what he did. And he regrets it. This was something that tortured him for a long time. He went to Korea feeling this way... feeling that all of his recent choices had been wrong. And he really chose badly. You weren't willing to forgive him, you weren't even willing to listen to him and when you finally talked you told him that you didn't love him anymore. I think the mixtape was the result of his reflection, it is the expression of these ideas. The creative process can be healing as well. Although in the songs he concludes that he has changed, he came back from there more like Yoongi than before."

"You mean the Yoongi from before he was with me."

"Yes."

"So you think he doesn't love me anymore."

"I think you should talk to him, if you want an answer to that question. But what I can tell you is that the Yoongi from before always had an open heart to love you. He was ready for that since he met you."