i go back out into the gym and over to amelie in a hurry.
you: i'm leaving. i don't feel too good.
amelie: ok. want me to drive you home?
you: n- no josh is taking me
she hugs me goodbye and i leave the school in a hurry. i get in the uber i had called, and he drives me to my house. i run in and go straight to my room before steven or anyone can stop me. i lay in bed as my eyes start to water.
i open the classroom door a bit and can't believe my eyes. nessa is laying on a table without clothes. she has her lag draped over josh's shoulder as he pounds his dick into her. i wanted to say something. anything. just a simple letter 'j' but i couldn't. i just close the door and leave.
how could he do this to me? he told me he was into me. except i have no right to be upset or mad. we weren't dating or anything. but i am upset. and i am mad. he was just leading me on. or using me to make nessa jealous to get her back. i feel used and unwanted. more unwanted than i've ever felt. and that's saying something. i couldn't tell amelie or anyone because i didn't wanna ruin their night.
this is one of those times that a girl needs their mom. someone to cry to over boys. or at least maybe i could talk to my dad. but he's at work like always. carmen is on vacation this week so i can't even talk to her. dammit i feel so alone.
the next day.
i get ready for school even though i don't wanna face josh. i take the jeep and drive to school, parking and getting out. instead of walking in the halls with my friends like usual, i just go to bio. anthony mads and josh are already in there for some reason. josh comes up to me smiling.
josh: hey kate
he leans down trying to kiss me but i push him away gently and go towards mads and anthony.
you: ant can we switch seats?
anthony: ya. everything good?
i nod and take his seat next to mads.
mads: everything alright?
you: ya just wanted to sit with you
she smiles a bit. i know she can tell somethings up. i don't wanna tell anyone because i don't want them fucking up their friendships with josh over something between him and i. josh is standing by anthony and looks confused. ugh. he's acting like he didn't do anything.
at lunch i take a seat between bryce and avani. josh doesn't look confused anymore. just disappointed.
amelie: i thought josh took you home last night katelyn?
you: i- i couldn't find him so i took an uber
he looks down at his fork.
bryce: josh where were ya?
josh: i-
you: he texted me after. he was in the bathroom. i just missed him.
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