josh's pov~
i'm standing in the doorway of katelyns old room in the house. the last time i've stepped foot in there was when i moved in and thought to put brookes room in there. but since i decided not to, that room has been off limits to anyone and everyone. i keep it locked and keep the key hidden in my dresser. finally i'm going in.
it's the exact same way it was years ago. i go sit on the bed and put my head in my hands. fuck i'm such a mess. i want things to go back to the way they used to be. me and katelyn together. we were so happy. i wanna be like that again. i miss her so god damn much. she's back and we can be like that again. but i don't wanna forgive her. but i do want to. but i love jess. but i've always loved katelyn. ughh my mind is so scrambled.
i've been laying there crying for a bit when there's a soft knock on the open bedroom door.
jess: i think your daddy needs a hug
brooke comes over to the bed hugging me and i hug her back.
jess: you ok?
i don't even know what to say to her. i feel like a complete idiot. jess deserves so much. yet she's got me. the guy who cannot make up his fucking mind. i don't deserve her. she deserves someone who can love them without a doubt.
josh: i- i'm fine
she moved the hair out of my eyes and kisses my cheek.
josh: b- brooke why don't y- you go eat s- some lunch?
jess: i think that's a good idea. just go ask steven
she nods and runs off.
josh: i- i- i-
jess: hey babe it's okay. amelie told me. i understand things are complicated right now and your unsure of how you feel. that's perfectly fine. i get that you loved katelyn and those feelings might come back.
i forget sometimes that her ex bf (stellas dad) left them. she really does get it.
jess: you can take as long as you need to figure out. no rush. either way, i'm here for you and i love you no matter what
how is she so nice and understanding? this is why i love her. then something in me made an impulse decision at last second. i get down on one knee and pull the ring from my pocket.
josh: i- i love you too. y- you understand me better th- than anyone else
jess: josh-
josh: w- will you marry me?
she looks at me with sad eyes before cupping my cheeks in her hands.
jess: why are you doing this j? your hurting and i said you can take your time-
josh: b- but i was gonna ask you b- before she showed up
jess: your not thinking clearly-
josh: yes i am. i am thinking clearly. and i want you to marry me. i want you to be my wife and move in here with me and brooke. i love you so so much. please jess. marry me
jess: ok
she shyly smiles at me and i can tell she's worried about me.
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