Her Balance | Nikolai x Reader x Darkling

~ Chapter 1 ~

Let's get into it.

First Person - Y/n

Standing on the crowded road, I looked down onto the fields and farms of the Tula Valley and got my first glimpse of the Shadow Fold.

My field army was stationed at the military encampment at Poliznaya and I had gotten the chance to walk away from the endless meetings and breath in the fresh autumn air. I pulled my coat slightly closer to myself as I stared at the dark haze on the horizon.

A heavy shoulder slammed into me from behind. I tripped and nearly fell face-first into the muddy road but managed to get my groundings

"Hey!" shouted the soldier. "Watch your-General Oreli! I'm so sorry. I should've seen where I was going."

"It's fine, Daltov," I replied waving him off. "Just watch yourself."

He nodded and walked away, and I felt a pair of hands wrap around my torso.

"It's amazing how men the size of Daltov fear you," said a voice and turned around to see Alina standing behind me.

"Perks of being me," I replied smiling. "You know I didn't want this position at first, but I gotta say it's definitely fun."

"Which part? The fear you install or having about fifty thousand men and women at your disposal?"

"Both?"

Alina laughed and I laughed with her. As we walked, I took in the fresh smells of the autumn wood, the soft breeze at my back. We were on the Vy, the road that had once led all the way from Os Alta to the wealthy port cities on Ravka's western coast before the Shadow Fold had devastated the country.

Somewhere in the crowd, someone was singing. Singing?

"Who on earth is singing right now?" asked Alina.

"Probably a crazy one," I answered.

"Reminds me of Maxim," said Alina and I smiled at her. "He was crazy like that."

Maxim Antonov. He was a Prime General for Field Army 3 of the Ravkan Forces. The Field Army that was at my command. He was also someone important to me, and not in the way that Alina or Mal was. Something more loving and more passionate.

He and his brother had died on the border two years ago for a mission that the King seemingly didn't trust a woman to handle. There was outrage on the Commander's part but eventually, it was up to the king.

I could still hear his voice in my head the day after.

"He's gone, Y/n."

"No...he can't be. I saw him last week, he and I were..."

"I'm sorr-"

"Hey, stop that," said Alina's voice, and I was shaken out of the memory. "Don't do that to yourself."

"I'm not doing anything," I retaliated trying to look normal.

"I'm not stupid, and I am your best friend. I know that look. It's when you're reliving that day. I'm sorry for bringing it up."

"No, no, it's my fault. If he was here, he would be yelling at me for thinking about him depressingly."

"I can't argue with the truth."

I smiled at her and as I did I glanced at the smudge on the horizon. I'd seen the Shadow Fold on many maps that Alina had drawn. And everything that was happening came back to me.

Today was the day that the people being deployed for the Fold run were being chosen. And to my own irritation, I would have to be the one telling everyone. As if my job wasn't hard enough, I had to look people in the eye and tell them that they were being put on a ship to be sent into the Shadow Fold.