you'll find me here forever ➳ kol mikaelson [ the vampire diaries ]

☆ 3.16 ~ in my head

here's the thing, you're in love
with a version of a person that
you've created in your head,
that you are trying to but cannot fix.
uh, the only thing you can fix is yourself.
i love you,
this has gone on way too long.
enough is enough. i'm two blocks away;
i'm coming over

•

painted a picture,
i thought i knew you well

"P-please don't make a show of it," Lydia found herself begging him."Just pick one person or I can get you a blood bag-"

"But that is no fun," Kol grinned."And that is what it is all about, darling. Fun."

Lydia glanced up at Kol with sad eyes, wondering how she had managed to keep from crying this whole time. It hurt to look at Kol, to look into his eyes and not see the man she once knew. It hurt even more to accept that this wasn't some dream. This was real.

i got a habit of seeing what isn't there

"Other people would not even dream of it," Kol continued as he released the pendent and let it fall around her neck much to her confusion."Not if they did not want me to rip their tongue out. But luckily for you, I find it attractive so you can relax. I will not hurt you."

Lydia's lips parted slowly as Kol backed away from her, scanning her with his eyes but he didn't say another word before turning and walking out of the door, leaving Lydia pressed against the bathroom door alone. She wasn't sure what to even think in this moment. It wasn't like Kol had hurt her. In fact, he promised that he wouldn't and told her that he found her attractive

caught in the moment,
tangled up in your sheets

Lydia didn't know what to respond with. She couldn't say no because she was a terrible liar and Kol would see right through it. But she couldn't say yes because she didn't want to know, so she glanced up at Kol as he placed his arm against the wall, trapping her in between it and him."You know. . . I've seen you four times now and each time you pressed me against something."

Kol raised his eyebrow and glanced down at Lydia, as a small grin rugged at his lips. He leaned in a bit closer to Lydia, enough that his lips hovered just in front of hers."Perhaps the fifth time will be onto a bed."

Lydia closed her eyes tightly, inhaling and biting down on her bottom lip. If she closed her eyes, if she blocked out the events that happened today, if she pretended that everything was okay, it almost felt like nothing had changed. His presence still felt the same with her eyes closed, his scent was still comforting to her. Lydia wouldn't have done this if it was indeed a stranger in front of her. She wasn't the type of person to kiss someone she wasn't with, yet she didn't hesitate to press her lips against his and he didn't hesitate to kiss her back.

when you broke my heart,
i said you only wanted half of me

Lydia sighed and turned to look at the blonde vampire, feeling a bit bad for being hard on her."You didn't. It's just what happened this morning. . . I know he's not himself and he doesn't know who I am but-"

"I understand," Rebekah responded as she thought back to earlier."You still love him. You are allowed to be upset that-"

"He doesn't love me," Lydia finished for her, taking a deep breath and leaning back in her seat, but every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was that woman leaving Kol's room.