thoughts & feelings

insecure

every little thing
builds up to how insecure i am
hatred piles up
i hate everything right now.

like candids,
theyre meant to be sweet
but not when i look like this.
like when im talking
and someone takes a picture
and sends it to me
and i look at it,
and analyse how i look

i look even worse when im talking
or smiling
or laughing
or in general,
i can just never look good.

and then i think about it
i dont see me all the time,
and when i do, all i do is hate myself
how do other people perceive me?
people that see me all the time
they must look at me and think the same

and what about him?
how could i be so stupid to think that he would like me?
come on, i dont even like me!
why would he?

and the more i think about it,
the worse it gets,
and the more insecurities build up