thoughts & feelings

church

you tell me youre going to church in the morning
i lie back on my bed and think about what that means
for you, it may just be a simple statement
or a warning of the lack of messages i might receive
a simple gesture to say
"i still care, I'll be back soon"
or it might be you letting me in
telling me about yourself
about your love for routines
or you dependency on a higher power
on how going to church once a week,
at 9am, for an hour,
never more, never less
makes you feel more secure in yourself, and your future
even though you claim and swear you dont believe
when youre stood in those rows,
surrounded by all those people who might feel differently
listening to the words the priest says
as he reads out the Bishops letter
on how believing in God and spreading his word
will give you a place in heaven.
because heaven, to you, has never become apparent on earth
you have never believed in the words carefully copied out in the bible

but being stood there,
having them preached to you is different
because when you hear them with such passion,
the belief from when you were a kid
slightly flickers up within you
it may burn out when you leave,
but as long as its there, in that moment
you might have hope
to live another day