Dearest,
What the fuck.
I always thought I was safe, that it would never happen to me.
Im not attractive enough, it could never happen. But it happened.
I thought it could happen because no one wants me.
It happened.
Maybe I'm overreacting.
But I don't think I will ever forget the fear of not being able to do anything, not being able to stop him, not being able to just run and not look back.
I'm pissed off.
And I'm scared.
And very pissed off.
It was after school, and I tried to work on my art project but I think I just made it worse. So I gave up and headed home early.
But as I was walking down the halls guess who I ran into.
No fucking guess.
Fucking Francis.
I tried to ignore him as I was walking but of course when he passed me he pinned me against the wall, cause why fucking shouldn't he?
"When are you going to let me have you?" He whispered, holding me back when I tried to move away.
"You're not going to 'have me'. I'm not an object. Let me go Francis." I struggled against him, trying my walk, or run, away.
"But I'm so sick of you looking so damn sexy and playing hard to get. You're basically a walking tease. You can't just be a slut and expect me not to act, you're so damn hot." He held my hands back against the wall so I was unable to move, and pressed his body up against me while he spoke. I could feel his budge, that pervert was fucking hard.
"Get away from me." I whispered, on the verge of tears.
"I want you." He whispered back, and it was then I started crying.
I pressed my head back against the wall, trying so hard to get away from him. "No..."
He kissed me, forcefully. I cried more. I tried to move my head, turning it sideways to make myself out of reach, but he took one hand away from mine and slapped me around the face.
I gasped, and sobbed, and he kissed me again, forcing his tongue down my throat.
I just sobbed, whispering "No" whenever I could.
I had my entire body completely pushed away from him, I couldn't move, what more could I do? Maybe it was my fault. I could have kicked him. It was my fault. I could have gotten away.
I thought this was it, I thought I was going to get raped.
But he was harshly dragged away from me, and I fell to my knees, only then realising he was holding up my entire body weight; I had gone limp.
I cried, and through my tears, I saw Alex hold Francis up by the shirt collar and punch him in the face.
Alex looked back at me with so much anger in him I'd never seen before, and I was terrified he'd blame me, and I just sobbed, I just sat there and sobbed and Alex beat the living shit out of him.
When he finally knocked Francis unconscious, he came over to comfort me, but I just flinched away from his touch.
He came and sat next to me, and he waited till I didn't flinch when he reached out to me.
And he held me while I cried.
