The Shadow's Grip • bxb [COMPLETED]

-10-

Felix's P.O.V.

It's hard as fuck.

I haven't slept in a week and my eye bags are even more bigger than they were before. The Shadow has been testing mine and Dimitri's limits ever since we agreed that we'll work together.

I don't know if it's threatened or not, but it does a great job at holding us back. We haven't found out anything new or useful that can help us.

The diner down the street has became my second home and french fries are my daily meal. But since Dimitri seems to like them very much I can't bring myself to say anything.

The Shadow appears in our nightmares, not for long, and then it just leaves. It doesn't stay as long as it used to but it still leaves me sweating and trembling from fear. Lately, the lights have been on in my bedroom all night just because I've been too paranoid to stay in the darkness for too long.

For a change of scenery, I asked Dimitri to come over to my house today - and also because I'm going to be sick if I'll eat french fries again. It probably won't help much, but it doesn't hurt to try.

Hana is getting ready to leave for work and I'm just laying down on the couch in the living room, acting like the next moment I'll give out my last breath. Staying awake all those nights took a toll on me, of course.

"What's wrong?" she asks while grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and tossing it in her bag.

"Didn't sleep" I rub my eyes and sigh loudly enough so God himself can hear me.

"Did you take your pills?"

"Yeah"

I didn't actually. Now that there's another person that can see The Shadow I know there's nothing wrong with me. But I can't tell her that yet. Not when we have basically nothing figured out.

There's a knock on the door and I open it with a smile trying to mask as best as I can the fact that I'll collapse any second now.

Dimitri doesn't look like he cares that much about the impression he makes to other people. His eyes are half closed, his hair is messy and it seems that coming here was a great effort he was willing to make.

"Come in"

I don't have to tell him twice. He looks around the house, quickly but then moves towards the couch almost immediately to sit down on it and rest his head against a pillow.

"And who is this?" Hana glances at him and then at me.

"A friend... Uh... He's working night shifts so he must be tired" I shake him, a bit scared of what she might say about the fact that I just invited someone over without asking first.

"I see..." she looks at her watch and then panics seeing that she might be late if she doesn't leave right now.

"He's gonna stay here for a while"

"It's fine. Just don't burn the house while I'm gone" she ruffles my hair on her way out and I close the door with a smile.

A sigh leaves my lips as I'm making my way towards the couch and sit down next to Dimitri. His eyes are closed and his body seems relaxed now that it's finally resting even if it's for a bit.

"Are you sleeping?" I ask, to be sure.

"I wish. But I can't seem to take that risk anymore" he chuckles and opens his eyes slowly, almost as if the light is hurting him.

"So we're both absolutely exhausted. Great way to start our amazing plan"

I can't help but be bitter about it. Sometimes when I'm tired, and want to sleep more than anything, the wrong things leave my mouth without me even realizing.

"So it was the same? Nothing new?"

"I told you. I was drowning and saw that girl again. Other than that nothing new" I ruffle my hair and yawn.

"What if they're connected?"

"Huh?" I look at him confused.

"What if the girl and the fact that you're drowning are connected? I mean I also see things from the past. A church. But no person yet"

I sit and think for a second, my eyes staring at the empty space in front of me where a mug used to be on the table this morning.

What connection could there be between that girl and the sea? It doesn't make any sense. The fact that I have no idea who she is, is making the whole thing even more complicated that it should be.

"I used to go to the seaside with my parents every year... I loved it. But I was never afraid of it... Not like I am right now anyway"

"That's it!" he stands up suddenly, like something just electrocuted him.

"What?" I also stand up and look at him confused.

"We have our first clue! We're not totally hopeless!" he raises his hands in the air and by the way he walks around the room I can tell he's not tired anymore.

"Our first clue? The fact that we both see something from our past in the nightmares?"

"Yes! That's it! Maybe it's only a matter of time before the shadow also takes the form of someone in my dream. If it does then we can figure out even more!" he grabs my shoulders and shakes me, excited that we may have made a step forward.

"It's good to know at least one of us is hopeful"

"Aren't you?" he seems confused but also suspicious because of what I just said.

"No... It's just... I've gotten used to it. I hate to say this but I've accepted it without even trying to find a way out of it... It's weird to know that there might be a chance of getting rid of it"

I may sound like an idiot but it's truly how I feel. There's no need to lie to his face. Right now, I feel more pathetic than ever knowing that he's actually looking for a solution while I've learned how to take it and go on with my life as if nothing's happening.

I hate the fact that I've gotten comfortable in such circumstances. Maybe it's just the way I survive. Acting like nothing is happening and still being happy. Other people have it worse right? I should be grateful for what I have.

But I can't. No matter how hard it might be, what's happening is wrong. No matter how much I try to convince myself that I'm living a normal life, I'm not. It's far from normal and I should do something about it.

"We need to try" he looks at me hopeful and it's like his eyes tell me what his words don't.

I have to try and fight for my happiness.

----------

Hello!

I just want to say this to whoever is reading this: Thank you so much!!

If you like it, don't forget to leave a vote or a comment (it lifts me up and motivates me to write even more :) )

-🌙-