The Shadow's Grip • bxb [COMPLETED]

-40-

Dimitri's P.O.V.

I wake up with a sight I've never expected to see soon again. Felix sleeping in my bed, on my pillows, covered with my blanket.

I need at least 5 minutes to process everything that happened yesterday. He came back to me, I apologized, but still feel like an asshole and idiot. Then we cuddled like nothing happened and slept for hours.

When he arrived at my apartment it was evening and now it's night. Well, he can't go back home right now so he might as well stay here until tomorrow. If he wants to, of course.

I missed having someone around.

Careful, not to wake him up, I stand up from the bed and look at how clean everything is. Besides forgiving me and being my friend again, he also cleaned my home.

He really is an angel. And like the sensitive shit I am, I almost cry knowing how much he cares about me.

I'm tempted to go back to bed and spend more time with him, but he'll probably be hungry when he wakes up.

After months, I finally have the motivation to cook again. The only problem is that my fridge is empty and I have to make the best of what I have.

And the best I have right now is a frozen pizza and orange juice. I put the pizza in the oven and think about my life a bit more.

It's pretty much a mess so then why shouldn't I take risks? The damage is already done, there's no use in holding back.

I like Felix. Maybe even love him. I sure do. Even if I wasn't sure before, these past few months showed me that it's true. It was painful to only meet him when it's absolutely necessary.

"What are you doing?"

His voice startles me and I nervously grab two cups from the cupboard, trying to remain as calm as possible.

"I thought you might be hungry when you wake up... Sorry... I don't really have anything left to cook. Only pizza"

"That's alright"

I can't face him. I'm acting like an idiot. We only cuddled, it wasn't anything too weird or exaggerated.

"It'll be done in a bit" I say, trying to keep myself busy so I don't have to actually talk to him about anything right now.

So I grab all the dirty dishes that we didn't had the time to clean and wash them. Lost in thought, I don't even realize when Felix is standing right behind me.

"I'll help you" he whispers in my ear and I freak out.

I turn around ready to throw punches at him like he's some kind of serial killer. He leans against the cupboard, pinning me against it with no escape.

Fuck.

He's different. He's changed. I can see it even in his eyes. He seems more determined and sure of himself. Like someone who knows what they want and how to get it.

The pizza saves me, with the ding from the oven interrupting whatever moment we were having right now. I nervously laugh and take it out while Felix sits down at the table.

"Are you thinking about going back? It's already night so maybe you should stay"

His whole face lights up and he smiles nodding almost immediately.

"Sure! I'll just have to text Hana" he takes his phone out and I can't help but smile too.

I don't want it to be that obvious that I like him, now after I admitted it to myself.

After cutting the pizza, I sit down at the table across from Felix and think hard about what I should say next. I don't want to make this dinner awkward. If I can call it a dinner since it's 1 a.m.

"Delicious" he takes a slice and I scratch the back of my head.

"It's just frozen pizza"

"Anything you cook is delicious"

"I just put it in the oven" I grin and he waves his hand.

"Now Dima... No need to be modest"

Hearing that nickname again I can't help, but blush. I haven't gotten used to it yet, however liking the way it sounds when Felix says it.

Violet has called me that a few times to annoy me and it has never had the same effect as now.

Making me feel all warm inside and happy, but nervous and shaky at the same time. Pure bliss just because he's here with me and I know that our friendship isn't completely lost.

"Will you dye your hair again?" he asks gently caressing my hair, almost as if he's taking in the texture of it.

My whole body is frozen in shock and overwhelmed from all the touching and looks that Felix is giving me. Out of nowhere, he's the most confident person I know.

I'd like to do the same and show him how much I care but my mind goes blank whenever he's near. All I can think about is how beautiful he is.

"I will... I asked Violet to do it tomorrow... Or more like today since it's already past 12"

He nods and takes his hand away. As embarrassing as it sounds, I miss it and I have the urge to feel it again.

While being at my lowest of course dying my hair was the last thing I thought of. Surviving seemed more important than being stylish.

My roots are more visible now, revealing my natural brown color. I remember that Harper told me he thinks I would look good in pink. That's why I decided to dye it after his death. I wasn't really brave enough to do it while he was still here.

There's a comfortable silence while we eat and I like it.

I think it's time to tell him everything. What I buried down inside, careful not to let anyone see it. Saying it doesn't affect me anymore, when in fact it does.