Stand By Me - Leah Williamson

The Rabbit Hole

TW: very dark themes and graphic descriptions

Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3hlwq90oGKKspwrGeAn1hE?si=23e85486c4bf4281

Kameron's POV

It had been a week since Leah had moved in and we still had a couple of days until Arsenal training began again, the break had felt long. 

"You sure you're going to be okay if I leave you?" Leah asked, she had a TV interview today with Beth but had been going back and forth worrying about me, there was really no need.

"Yeah, of course. I'll probably just stay here and watch TV," it wasn't a big deal to me. 

"Only if you're sure," she checked once again. 

"I'm sure Le, go and have fun."

"Okay," she bent down, as I sat on the sofa, and kissed my forehead, "I love you Kam."

"Love you more Le."

And then I heard the door close behind her, for about thirty minutes I just sat there, scrolling endlessly through channels on the TV, nothing sounding appealing. 

I had been cooped up in the apartment for a while so I thought that some fresh air might do me some good, I pulled on my joggers and one of Leah's hoodies. I loved how they all smelt like Leah, it made me feel like I was constantly being hugged by her. And then I pulled on a coat and my trainers, grabbed my keys and off I went.

I'd decided to go down to the café where I'd once ran into Leah, it held fond memories and was the closest place to my apartment. Last week, my management team had warned me that I'd pretty much become a household name now days, which was insane to wrap my head around, but I hadn't seen anyone yet and to be honest, I didn't feel like seeing anyone. Not that I hated meeting fans, I loved it normally, but I was tired.

In the past few days, the high of the Euros had slowly been coming down, leaving me with whatever feelings I'd never truly recovered from, they'd just been concealed by the excitement and business of the tournament it seemed. I didn't want to tell anyone about it though, they were all so happy and proud of me, I couldn't ruin that/

When I arrived in the café I was thankful to see it basically empty, only one man working and two elderly ladies having a quiet gossip in the corner. 

"Hi, can I have a coffee please?" I asked the barista.

She nodded, ringing it through the till, "You're Kameron Quinn right?" She asked in a kind manner.

"Yeah."

"Sorry to ask but my sister is a massive fan, do you reckon if I could get a picture?"

I was more than willing to do it because she'd asked so kindly, "Yeah course. Just if you're going to post it, can you wait? Kind of hoping for some quiet time in here."

"Of course. Thank you so much!" I took the picture and my coffee and then went and sat in one of the chairs near the back.

I was just scrolling through my phone, trying to escape reality and pass time, though then I found myself more knocked to the head by reality, than ever. 

Somehow, I'd gotten to the bottom of the posts of everyone I followed and I'd just continued scrolling, not thinking anything of it until I came across a post about me. It was a side by side comparison of me in 2019 compared to 2022, pointing out my dramatic weight loss. I knew I shouldn't have but I couldn't resist clicking on the comments, I'd already seen the post, what more damage could be done? It was almost a reflex in those moments.

Scrolling through the comments I saw the most hideous things I'd ever seen people write:

only on the team for her looks