BRANCE + RINNEY

blurry sunlight and trauma

"Like this, okay?" Finn watched as a bandaid was slipped over his scraped skin, dried blood coating over the sides of it as it stuck to him like glue. He rubbed at it after a minute, being forgetful of the reason why the bandaid was on in the first place. "Shit!" Finn's voice was high, cracking with every other syllable spoken. He was only six. "Don't curse Finn." The bandaid was pressed into his skin once more, laying flat again as it had been messed up with all the moving. "You curse." Finn watched as the small blades of grass next to him blew back and forth, swaying with each breath of wind. "Doesn't mean you should. We don't want you to end up like me." Finn didn't respond to the words, not being able to quite comprehend what they meant in his small brain. "You wanna go pick out some candy? I'll teach you how to play pinball!" Finn smiled and nodded his head. His legs were wobbly as he stood, though after a moment they stilled. "Pinball is lame, loser." Laughter rang beside him and he smiled even more. "Sure. Come on, I'll give you a piggyback ride."
—

Sweat glued Vance's clothes to his torso and back, making his skin cold as beads of it coated the fabric. Rubbing at his eyes, he exhaled a large breath of air.

"Fuck." Vance shook his head as he spoke, arms reaching slightly upward as he removed his shirt. It was cool in his room, the wind blowing from his opened window making it so. Standing up, Vance walked towards it.

The sun had just begun to rise. Oranges, reds, and deep yellows coated the sky, a painting of vibrant colors. Vance looked away from it and crossed his arms, his blonde curls falling near his eyes as he turned his back on the window.

"Vance?" The wooden floorboards creaked as Finn sniffled, feet tapping against the surface as he scratched at his shirt. Vance faced him and frowned. He knew what this was.

"Nightmare?" Finn nodded, looking down towards his feet as he sniffled once more. "Hold on." Vance grabbed a towel from his dresser and wiped at his skin before throwing on a clean shirt, making a mental note to shower after helping his little brother. "Come over here." Vance gave a wave of his hand and Finn listened.

—

"Why are all the lights out?" Finn was laid against Vance's back, bags of half-eaten candy sounding from his pockets as the older boy walked with him. "Dunno. Wanna help me light some candles?" Finn nodded his head and jumped down, smiling when Vance turned around, startled. "Don't fuckin' scare me like that. Jesus Christ. Uh, there's some candles in dad's room. Go get those for me." Vance rustled Finn's hair before turning around, presumably to find his own collection of candles. Finn, on the other hand, made his way to his father's room. His footsteps echoed loudly on the floor, so much so that it began to make his ears hurt. His fingers trembled by his sides as he inched closer to the door, shaking greatly as he wrapped them around the doorknob.

Opening it should've been easy. Walking into the room should've been easy.

But Finn was only six. He wasn't prepared.

Vance shouldn't have been prepared, he wasn't. But he acted like it. He had to.

—

Finn climbed into Vance's bed, tucking himself under the blankets and deep into the mattress. Vance sat near him but didn't lie down, eyes set on the rising sun as he placed a hand on the younger's hair.

"Wanna talk about it?" Finn moved away from Vance's hand, grabbing it to hold in his own instead. He nodded his head after a passing silence. "Yeah, okay."

Vance gave a squeeze to Finn's hand, urging him to speak.

"Dad and mom are gone. He said, he said he loved us. That he wouldn't be like her. But he is. He's exactly like her." Finn's voice was cracking and Vance was reminded of how young how we was. His age when it had happened. "He left us. He left like her. He was a liar." Vance gave another squeeze to Finn's hand and looked away from the sunrise. "Are you going to leave me too? Like they did." Finn sniffled and Vance looked at him. "No. No, I'm not." Finn moved closer to the older boy, snuggling against his hip as his eyes slowly began to close. "Good."

Finn's hand fell limp as he drifted into sleep. Vance removed his hand from the other's and placed it back into Finn's hair.

"Don't grow up on me kid. Don't be like me. I can't handle another me." Vance laughed, his vision turning blurry as he removed his hand.

The sun rose higher in the sky, falling into a pattern of golden specks and yellow paint as it poured into the bedroom.

Vance turned towards it and wiped his tears, feigning happiness as he smiled.

—

Terrance Blake was dead. Finney, a six year old boy who had spent the day eating candy and playing pinball with his older brother, had found him.

It wasn't a gory scene. But Finn had knew. There wasn't a smell, or a note. He had passed peacefully, willingly. As he had wanted.

Vance had held Finn as he cried, keeping his tears in as he realized there no was no one to comfort him.

He'd have to do it himself.

Just like he'd have to do everything else for the next 8 years.

Vance, a ten year old boy who knew everything and nothing at all, was now in charge of another life.

—

"Please don't end up like me."