A Saint To A Sinner

3.7

Never in Y/Ns life had she known a more awkward journey since Skade. No one had spoken the whole way to Cookham. Not to each other and nor to Young Uhtred. Afraid if one said something, it will trigger the other off. Occasionally, Y/N would look at Finan with a smirk, which would lead to her trying not to laugh. As soon as they got off the horses, Y/N walked straight off into the Alehouse with a laugh.
"He really doesn't like us." Finan chuckled behind her.
"What do you expect." Sihtric muttered as he walked off to get some ale. Y/N looked behind her to see Uhtred trying his best with his son, but it clearly had not worked out until Y/N caught sight of someone.
"Just my favourite man of the day." Y/N approached Osferth, who gave her a hug. Osferth was sent straight to Cookham to prepare Uhtreds army.
"What can I do for you, Lady?" Y/N shoved him slightly as she looked over towards Young Uhtred , who stood at his horse awkwardly.
"Please lend some encouragement to Young Uhtred. I fear if I approach, he will hate me more than he already does." Osferth sighed at her. None of them wanted to rock the tension that was already there.
"I will see what I can do."

Y/N slapped Osferths arm before walking back to her husbands who watched her curiously. Y/N took the cup of ale from Finan before looking back at Osferth, who approached Young Uhtred. All she could do was hope that Young Uhtred would see sense, but part of her understood why. Uhtred chose to make a name for himself while Gisela stayed with the children. She could understand from the young child's eyes why he was so distant. Y/N, too feared, whether Cynlæf would be like that when they returned. She did the same as Uhtred and left him behind, but she wasn't a hypocrite. She knew her mistakes, and she feared the consequences.

When that time came to prepare the boats, Y/N felt sick. It was as if her body wanted to keel over in fear and anxiety.
"Are you going to pass it to me or not?" Sihtric snapped her out of her thoughts, realising she still had not passed him the sack.
"Oh, sorry." She muttered as she watched Finan and Osferth complaining about the boat that they had wrecked a few months back.
"Do we not need something more... agile?" Finan shouted to Uhtred as he jumped on the boat. "We're not taking pelts to sell to Frankia."
"Do you want Aelfric to know that we are coming?" Uhtred said as we walked off.
"Pelts it is." Finan grunted as he looked back at his wife. Y/N gave him a look but continued to help Sihtric when she saw Father Beocca.

It surprised them. The last time they spoke, he was adamant about not fighting. Y/N looked at Finan, who had a positive look on his face, that meant one extra man to take Bebbanburg.
"Hey! What is wrong with yu?" Finan said as he noticed his wife frowning again, but she smiled it off. 
"What's wrong with her Sihtric?" Finan whispered.
"Maybe she just misses Cynlæf." Osferth piped up, but Sihtric shook his head, telling Finan it was more than that. Sihtric had a small idea of what it could be, but he wanted to wait until they were alone.
"Maybe it is because we do not have a plan." Y/N spat, causing Finan to laugh, telling Osferth to leave her alone.

It was true. Y/N was bothered that they didn't have a plan. That they where going to Bebbanburg without a sufficient plan.
"Yu need some ale, woman, and lots of it." Finan jumped out of the boat, taking his wife's hand in his, squeezing her in reassurance. Y/N followed him inside the Alehouse and sat at the bench with her head in her hands, as she waited for Finan.
"We do not have a plan!" She spat. Finan laughed as he handed her the cup.
"I know, but we can not turn back now." Finan looked at her, sitting on the corner next to her, placing his hand on her thigh. "We just have to trust, Uhtred. Besides, we've survived worse." It was true they had survived worse, but she could not help but worry. She looked at Finan, studying his face before looking around the room, trying to find an idea.
"Whatever yur thinking it will not be worth it." Finan said.

Sihtric approached them, placing a kiss on his wife's head as he sat beside her, handing her some food. Y/N watched Osferth give a bowl of food to Young Uhtred before joining them.
"Ah!" Y/N said, waving her finger in the air. "How about this. I whore my way through the guard and seduce Ælfric and then kill him when I have him alone." Finan and Sihtric stared at her with an unimpressed look, while Osferth grinned.
"Absolutely, not." Sihtric glared at her.
"Uhtred!" She called over. "How about this! I seduce Ælfric and then kill him!" Uhtred raised his cup to her with a smirk at her obnoxious idea, causing Finan to slam his hand on the table.
"Yu think we're going to allow it!" Finan grumbled at her, "we need more ale! Lots of it." Y/N pulled a face at Osferth who laughed awkwardly at her.
"It is a good plan. Unholy, but good." Beocca challenged. Y/N shook her head, squeezing her husbands legs.
"Look-" Sihtric cut her off with a glare, "you are mine and Finans wife. Why would we let you whore your way through Bebbanburg."
"I was trying to be helpful." She jested. Only really wanting to lighten the mood, she wasn't really going to do it.
"Well, don't." Finan grumbled at her.

"Did, Hild send you, to keep an eye on me?" Uhtred quickly changed the subject before an argument broke out between the married trio.
"No. It was entirely my descion." Beocca looked at them all before continuing. "You are right. I have allowed myself to get old too quickly. I shall leech off their youthfulness, revive myself." Y/N chucked at Beoccas' words as she looked him with a smile.
"What is the real reason?" Uhtred questioned.
"Word reached me of an abduction of a young deacon." Y/N looked at her husbands, who avoided Beoccas eye contact. Y/N stood up to get another jug of ale, leaving them with  Beocca.

Y/N approached the woman asking for another jug of ale, paying for it with a silver coin, when she felt someone's hand wrap around her waist.
"You are not a bad mother." Sihtric said, his hand resting on her lower back.
"The difference is we taught Cynlæf what it means to be a warrior. He knows we love him and we have to go." Y/N shook her head, trying not to cry, "but I do not have to be here." Y/N turned around to look at Sihtric, staring into his dark eyes, "what if he thinks I have abandoned him. What will happen when we return, ey? Will he have the same attitude like Young Uhtred."
"I think you will find his name is Oswald now." Sihtric said, his hand running it up and down her arm, "Cynlæf will not, because he is a smart boy. We have never lied to him. Never." Sihtric planted a kiss on her lips before taking the jug from her. She hoped he was right.