A Saint To A Sinner

3.30

One might say they were over joyed when they came across a small village. The children almost kissed the ground at the form of life, knowing there was hope for their little souls.
"Make sure the children and Y/N are fed and watered first." Uhtred said as he handed some silver to Finan and Osferth. Y/N sat down on a tree stump as she watched Cynlæf go with them. In truth, she did not think she could eat, but she knew she had too for her unborn child, no matter how tired she was.
"Mother." Cynlæf whispered. "You are still pale." Y/N knew she was struggling, and she was trying to hold on to herself as much as she could.
"I will be fine. I swear it on Thors Hammer." Cynlæf tilted his head, accepting the answer. She knew it was a terrible way to lie to her son, but she did not want him to worry. Shaking her head, she got up to find Sihtric trying to take his knife from Æthelstan.
"Æthelstan." Y/N called, making the boy hand it over to Sihtric, who ruffled his hair.
"Are you sure you are well?" Sihtric asked, but she did not respond when Uhtred approached them to discuss their new plans.

That they were to head to Aeglesburg to prevent Edward from putting Mercia in danger with the wrong successor. Y/N looked at Finan, who frowned at Uhtreds descion but continued to listen.
"Sihtric. You and my son will go and find Æthelflaed, tell her that her child is safe for now." Sihtric smirked at Young Uhtred who indeed looked slightly unsure with being alone with him.
"Eadith and Osferth will guard Ælfwynn until Edward has sworn he will not harm her." Uhtred said as he looked at them all. "And tell him what kind of a man he trusted."
"So we fight for peace, Lord? Again?" Finan said as he rested his arm on Cynlæfs head.
"We can not let them turn on each other. Besides, Y/N will be safer in Aeglesburg." Uhtred assured as he pointed to her stomach. He, too, knew the reality of what was happening.
"Safer?" Finan said with a huff.
"You know what I mean." Uhtred said before looking at them all for confirmation. "We do it?" The three of them agreed with Uhtred.
"Father. Can I come with you?" Cynlæf asked Sihtric. A hopeful look on his face. He really wanted to be a part of this knew battle. Even if it meant scouting the area or looking for Æthelflaed.
"Why not." Sihtric said with a smirk as he helped him up onto his horse. Sihtric looked back at Y/N and Finan with a smirk as he embraced her, "he will be safer with me, if you are to go to Aeglesburg." Finan agreed with Sihtric, knowing it was true.
"You are well? Are you not?" Sihtric whispered to her as her face buried itself in his arms. She kissed his shoulder, humming lightly, but he knew it was a lie.
"I will be fine." Y/N said as she looked up at his face, kissing his lips one last time before climbing onto her horse, taking Æthelstan on her horse.
"Be good to your father and listen to him well." Finan said to Cynlæf with a smile.
"I will, father. Remember to do as mother wishes." Cynlæf answered back, receiving a few chuckles from everyone as they bid each other goodbye.

The journey to Aeglesburg arrived quickly, and they were greeted by Father Pyrlig, who offered to hide them until Uhtred made an offer. Father Pyrlig hid Y/N, Æthelstan and Stiorra in a shed on the outside of Aeglesburgs walls, while Finan went with Uhtred. The four of them quietly amused themselves in the area they were hidden in, but Y/N was far from amused. She sat quietly with her head buried in her hands, sobbing to herself at the pain she was in.
"Y/N, forgive me, but I hate to see a woman cry." Father Pyrlig gently touched her shoulder, squeezing it for reassurance.
"You don't understand, father." Y/N whispered as she looked at Æthelstan reading his book while Stiorra carved into something. "My child should not be coming now. It will not live, and I do not think I can push it out either." Father Pyrlig sighed, a worried look on his face.
"Dear God. Umm. You need to lie down. Here! Here!" Father Pyrlig moved over some fur and old cloth to make some sort of bedding whilst he looked around. Making Stiorra and Æthelstan look up. "Lay here until I come back. I will need to get a few supplies." Father Pyrlig ran to Y/N, holding her hand tightly. "Now you listen to me, and you listen well. I will come back for you and you will not do it alone." Father Pyrlig turned to Stiorra a nervous forming on his face. "Keep Y/N distracted while I get some things. Do not let her get too warm."

Y/N sat on pile laid out and just stared into space. Grunting out every so often. She knew what was going to happen, and she did not want to do it in a room of children. Stiorra seemed to realise what was happening and sat Æthelstan in a corner so he could not see her. Y/N painfully started to pull off her bottoms and then placed a blanket over her legs to cover her.
"Stiorra. Take him outside and stay with him." Y/N said.
"I will not leave you." Stiorra spoke back, but Y/N shook her head, "I will be fine. I can do it alone." Stiorra awkwardly took Æthelstans hand and left, causing her to cry. She knew. Of course, she knew what was going to happen to Y/N, but no one wanted to say it or believe it.
"Y/N! Oh God." Father Pyrlig rushed over, trying to shake her awake. "Y/N. Good Heavens, do not shut your eyes." Y/N slowly reached her hand out towards Father Pyrlig a sad look on her face, "the child is coming to early, and it will die."
"That is the cruel truth, perhaps." Father Pyrlig spoke with strain, not trusting his own voice, "it may live. You do not know." Y/N laughed slightly as the tears dropped pathetically across her face, "you know I will die, father. You know I will. I will not get through the labour. I am too weak." Father Pyrlig followed his eyes to where her hand led as it picked up her sword.
"I can not. Finan would not forgive me, let alone your Danish husband." Y/N sighed as she looked at Father Pyrlig.
"You know it is the truth, Pyrlig."
"I know. Oh! I know, but I am willing to risk your life by pulling that child out. And God for bid I am wrong and you do not survive. I walk the streets as Jesus once did before his death." Father Pyrlig said harshly. He would rather risk a public whipping than face Finan and Sihtric if he aided her in suicide.
"Pray to your God's and I will pray to mine." Father Pyrlig said as he handed her a cup of liquid. Y/N closed her and drank the liquid before swinging her head back, trying to force out the child with every last bit of strength she had.

The truth is...

Maybe it was her time to die....