Secrets

Chapter 15

"Why didn't you ask anyone to be present for this..." Steve asks me his face tense his hands on his hips and i sigh... "Not now Steve..." I say rolling my eyes... "Yes now...!" He says raising his voice... "Why is it that you always seem hellbent on putting yourself in dangerous situations..." He says his voice now even louder... "It is not like i do it fucking on purpose... How was i supposed to know he turned out to be a nut job..." I yell back at him...  "You all hired him..." I yell back...

"Cleo..." He says but i hold up my hand for him to stop talking... I walk around my desk and towards the door closing it... I have had enough and right then and there i decide i had enough... It is make or break time... No more trying to be nice and convince him i can do this job... Now is the time to let it all out...

"Okay Rogers i have had enough..." I say walking towards him and stepping in front of him... "Enough?" He asks confused... "Yes, enough now out with it..." I say poking his chest and because he is caught off guard, he loses balance but quickly regains himself... 

"What is so terrible about me that you hate me so fucking much..." I say now pushing him... not that it helps because it is like pushing a brick wall...  "Language..." He mumbles and i lose it... "Oh for the love of all things holy get off your fucking high horse..." I say pushing him again with everything i got... Not that it helps...

"What... Cat got your tongue?" I say punching his chest again... "What do you fucking want from me...!" I yell almost desperate because i dont know what else to do anymore..."Stop it..." He growls and i can't help but smirk... "Dont go shy now Captain... Let it all out... I am giving you the chance to let it all out... Come on i know you want to..." I say as i start hitting him letting all my pent-up frustrations towards him out... He doesn't stop me, and he just looks at me with dark eyes...  

"You have no idea what i want..." He growls when i finally stop punching his chest "Then fucking show, me... Dont be a fucking coward now... Dont tell me the big strong Captain America is a fucking coward at heart... Come on be the fucking big strong man you pretend to be..." I yell and i try to push him again with both hands... 

Before i fully grasp what is happening, he grabs me by my shoulders and walks me back pushing me against the wall... I should be afraid at this but somehow i am not... My heart is just racing as he grabs my face with both hands and leans in hesitating for a minute... "You drive me fucking crazy... You know that..." He growls his lips hovering over mine... "Language captain..." I whisper and he groans. "Oh, just shut the fuck up..." He growls in a low dark tone... before pressing his lips on mine... 

It feels like fireworks exploding all through my body... His soft lips pressed on mine in a hungry and almost desperate kiss... One of his big strong hands now in my neck holding me in place...I let out a little moan and he uses it to invade my mouth with his tongue... He explores my mouth and i wrap my arms around him pulling him closer... My body is taking over and i can't think anymore... Our tongues are now doing a sensual dance caressing each other tasting each other... 

I gasp as he starts to move his mouth leaving a trail of kisses over my cheek towards my neck immediately finding my pulse point and i move my head to the side giving him better access... His big strong hands are now roaming my body and i can feel his one hand cup my breast through my shirt massaging it as he grabs my ass with the other one... He starts to grind into me and i can feel him getting hard... I start to pull on his shirt wanting to feel his warm skin... The body heat i have been craving without realizing... Every one of my senses is engulfed by him... His smell... His warmth... How his lips feel on my skin... It is overwhelming but fuck it feels good... 

I let my hands glide under his shirt, and he groans as i lightly scrape his skin with my nails... I can feel his muscles flex under my touch... He shivers and groans as i move my hands all over him wanting to feel every inch of him... We briefly come up for air and he presses his forehead against mine both of us breathing heavy...

He presses his lips on mine again... I grant him access... Our tongues find each other again... He pulls me off the wall and walks me towards the couch never breaking the kiss... He lays us down trapping me underneath him and i feel his hand glide under my shirt and cup my one of my breasts... I move my hand and cup his dick through his pants, and he groans... I can feel him grow bigger and bigger... I start to fumble with the button of his pants.

But all of a sudden, he stops... and he pushes himself up... "I am sorry..." He mumbles and stands up straightens out his clothes and walks out of my office not even giving me a second glance... leaving me absolutely baffled behind... I sit up on the couch wondering what the fuck just happened... I am dazed and confused... but mostly i am worked up and frustrated... I look down at my clothes which are all wrinkled and out of place... 

I feel numb and still in a daze as i stand up and straighten out my clothes... I fix my hair... and sit back down behind my desk... I just stare at the screen of my laptop... What just happened... What the fuck just happened i scream internally at myself... How could i let this happen... Why did i let this happen... How can i be so stupid... I yell at myself internally... But soon my tone changes... Why did he stop... Was i just heat of the moment and did he come to his senses?  Is this some sort of game to drive me crazy... Is there something wrong with me?  

I dont know how long i am sitting there when Tony calls asking me if they should order dinner or if i am going to cook... I tell him i am still working and to just order something... When i know they are all eating dinner i sneak to my room and lock the door behind me... 

I take a scolding hot shower in an attempt to erase the memory of Steve's hands all over me... I try my best to erase it all, but it doesn't help... All the soap and mouthwash can't erase how his hand felt on my body... How he kissed me... How he tasted... And all i can think is something must be wrong with me...

Tears start to come through and i crawl into bed crying myself to sleep...