PLEASURABLE RESTRICTIONS ✔️

Chapter Forty Eight

AFTER a week, I came back to kuya Cain's penthouse and I found him there, drinking liquor in broad daylight. Nang makita niya ako ay agad siyang napatayo sa kinauupuan niya at nang makalapit ako sa kanya ay doon ko lang napagmasdan ang hitsura niya. He looked like a mess. Ang gulo ng buhok niya, nangingitim ang ilalim ng mata niya na parang ilang araw nang hindi nakakatulog. He's reeked of alcohol and cigarette and his bruises lightened though it added to make him look like a real mess.

"Adina..."

"Kuya, I want to talk." I said and sat across from him. "I was mad before that's why I didn't take a chance to understand things. I want to hear everything from you, kuya."

Naupo naman siyang muli. "Okay."

"Is it true that you kill people?"

"Yes." He nodded as he was looking straight in my eyes. "Hindi ko sinasabi sa'yo dahil hindi puwede. Hindi mo puwede malaman ang kahit ano tungkol sa organisasyon na kinabibilangan ko. I've been in this kind of work ever since I was fifteen, Adina and I can't tell you that because I don't want to put your life in danger. The more you know about it, the more you'll be in danger."

I tried to keep my eye contact to him but I could feel the heavy pressure. Tila parang nag-iba sa paningin ko si kuya Cain sa isipin na malayo ang pamamaraan niya ng pamumuhay kaysa sa'kin.

"Why did you kill my mom? Utos ba ni Regan sa'yo 'yun?"

"Nah. Hindi siya ang naguutos sa'kin kung sino ang papatayin ko, Adina. I killed your mom because of our organization's long feud. Bago pa man ako makapasok sa organisasyon ay magkalaban na sila at pinatay ang ina mo para mawala ang balanse sa loob ng grupo nila. It's like playing chess. Once the queen is down, it will affect the king; and once the king is down, it will be a checkmate. It will be over for everyone."

Hindi ako nakapagsalita. Naiintindihan ko ang punto niya pero masakit pa din sa'kin na malaman na ang taong malapit sa buhay ko ay ang siyang pumatay sa ina ko. I can't comprehend this truth and I don't know how to face it.

"I didn't want to kill your mom, you must understand that. We live in a different way and I have no choice but to obey. Adina, I know you're mad at me and I know you never want to see me after hearing the truth. I lied because I never want you to hate me and I'm sorry for doing that. Hindi pala matatakpan ang isang kamalian ng kasinungalingan kaya sobrang gusto kong humingi ng tawad sa'yo. Part of me telling a lie because I don't want you to be with Seamus dahil sa oras na mangyari 'yun ay hindi na kita makikita."

"Totoo pala na nilalayo mo ako sa kanya? Kaya ba dinala mo ako sa Italy at pinakilala kay Evo para malayo ako kay Seamus?"

"Yes." Muli siyang tumango. "Totoo 'yun. Totoong ginamit ko ang sitwasyon niyo ni Sandro para mailayo ka sa bansang 'to at mas mabantayan kita. That's why I never want you to come back in this country."

"Edi hindi din totoo na dahil kay Chastity kaya nilalayo mo ako kay Sandro?"

"No. Sandro and I came to an understanding about her and I knew about Chastity's child with Jesux." Sagot niya at huminga ng malalim. "I tried taking you away from him because he ruined your life in the convent and Magnus is using you as an opportunity to ruin your life with Sandro. I only care about you, all right? That's why I'm sorry, Adina. Sorry for everything I did and even if you can't forgive me, I still want to tell you that I'm really sorry."

"Kuya, malaki ang pasasalamat ko sa'yo dahil binigyan mo ako ng kalayaan. You helped me get away from Magnus and you helped me change the life I used to have. I can forgive you. Naiintindihan ko lahat ng sinabi mo sa'kin. Naiintindihan ko ang mga rason mo kung bakit mo 'yun nagawa. If God can forgive sinners, why wouldn't I? I told myself that I will try to look on positive reasons even if a person made a mistake. Iyon ang natutunan ko sa pagiging madre ko noon. Pero ito din ang dahilan kung bakit sinasamantala ng mga tao ang kabaitan ko."