Open Your Arms

Chapter 47

May 20, 2004

Things have finally worked out for Ville and I. We've come up with a plan for his touring. He's going to be taking a break until the baby arrives because he wants to be with me for the process of the pregnancy. Then, after I give birth, after a couple months, he'll have me tag along with him. 

Right now, he's able to focus on new songs for his upcoming album. He won't let me read the lyrics, though. Every single time I get even remotely close to the notebook page that has them all written down, he pulls them away. 

His mother has offered us a lot of help and is going to stay for the last month of my pregnancy so she can be there when the baby is born. My mom, on the other hand, hasn't reached out at all since the gender reveal, which is fine by me. It just hurts that my own mother won't do something about this, but Ville's mom will. 

Hailey has been a lot of help. Even though it's only been a couple of days since the gender reveal, she's called me for a while (hours sometimes) and talked to me about the baby and the memories that we're going to make once he's born. 

Ville and I have been busy deciding boy names. So far we have agreed on none. He wants a Finnish name for him, which I don't mind, but none of them sound nice. I suggested that the first name could be English and the middle name could be Finnish, but he didn't seem too keen on that idea. 

"Are you ready to go?" I ask Ville as he lays down on the couch without his shoes on and his bare feet out. "What are you doing?!"

"What are you talking about?" He sits up and leans forward, grabbing his socks off of the ground and slipping them on, then his Converse. "Larissa, did you know that I did a song with the lead singer of Rasmus and a band called Apocalyptica?"

"No I did not," I tell him as I grab my keys off of the kitchen counter, my purse, and then open up the front door. "You can tell me all about it when we get in the car, but we're going to be late, so come on."

I carefully walk down the stairs out of the apartment, not wanting to fall. I grip onto the railing as tight as I can and hear Ville come down next to me. 

"Don't worry, I locked the door," He says before I can even ask him. I always double check just to be sure. 

We get into the car and I immediately start driving. 

"Okay, tell me about the song," I remind him. "What kind of music does that band make?"

"Which one? Rasmus does rock I guess and Apocalyptica is a classical band. They do instrumentals."

"Oh, so it's a bunch of violins and cellos and stuff?" I ask him. "That sounds really pretty. I want to hear it. When does it come out?"

"Sometime in November."

"Have you recorded it yet?"

"Yeah, I recorded it the day before I came back to Pennsylvania."

"That's exciting," I say as we pull into the doctor's office. "Are you ready?"

He nods and I open up the driver's seat and hold my hands out for him to help me get out. I'm perfectly capable of doing it on my own, but I like it when he helps me. He pulls me out and I bump my head on the interior of the car. 

"Shit," I say and we both begin to laugh. I shut the door behind me and lock it, then we walk inside while holding hands. I walk up to the nurse behind the desk and she tells me that the doctor will be right with me. 

Ville and I take a seat in the middle of the room. There are two rows of chairs that are touching but are facing the opposite directions.

"How much bigger do you think it's going to be compared to the first one?" Ville asks, referring to the baby in the ultrasound picture.